Dawn of the Daze

Well this is awkward.

Remember the time Jay Leno retired from The Tonight Show, and then a few months later had massive regrets then un-retired, screwing over Conan in the process? Well other than the inclusion of a spurned, lanky redhead I feel like both mine and Jay's stories share a lot of similarities. I wonder if Medibank Private covers chin implants.

It's been 9 months since we closed the door on ParmaDaze, and what a 9 months it has been. Now I'm not saying that wrapping up a chicken parma review blog was directly related to the world going to shit, but, well, I'll just leave this here and let you draw your own conclusions…

No need to harp on about what a year 2020 was, we all lived it, we all know. I don't know how we possibly could have kept ParmaDaze running during lockdown (there are only so many tinfoil boxes of thoroughly steamed Uber Eats parmas a man can eat) so in a way the timing of us calling quits on parma reviews when we did worked in our favour.

However now that we're coming out of lockdown I realised how much I miss it. Countless times over the last 9 months I have told people that I used to run ParmaDaze and every time it has left a sour taste in my mouth. Every time I hear about a new pub that has opened with a parma on the menu I think to myself "oh we should check that out" before remembering that's not something we do anymore and spiralling into sadness. I spent ten years as “the parma guy” and godamnit I’m not ready to give that up!

Then something occurred to me. I still have the website. I'm still paying Squarespace's exorbitant hosting fees and other than my dramatic "End of Daze" post there's absolutely nothing stopping us spinning things back up now that Victoria is returning to a sense of normality.

So that's exactly what we're gonna do.

Now it won't be exactly as it was, part of the reason for the shut down was that I was getting burned out on being locked into a weekly update schedule, so going forward there won't be any set time, more of a "when we feel like it" laissez faire management style rather than being beholden to a weekly update (So be sure to follow on Facebook or Twitter for notifications, I might even straight up cross-post to Facebook this time around to make things a bit easier to find).

I also haven't run any of this by the ParmaDaze review team. They are more than welcome to rejoin our little adventure of course, and no ill will to them at all if they're still enjoying retirement and have no desire to return, so I’m guessing that from here on out it’ll mostly be a solo adventure (other than Reviewer Nikki who is legally obligated via marriage to stay involved, sucks to be her lol).

I'm still plugging away at the oh so mysterious "PD 2.0" project, things are progressing (albeit slower than expected) and that will still appear eventually, although possibly with a slight re-brand to keep the current ParmaDaze page in tact.

So that's it! I haven’t got a review pre-written or anything so it might be a week or so before the next update. Apologies for the emotional roller-coaster that these two consecutive blog posts have been, hopefully our return can be seen as sliver of good news in the clusterfuck that has been 2020. The break over the last nine months has recharged my batteries and I am ready to get out there and see what kind of amazing parmas Melbourne has to offer.

The search resumes...

End of Daze

Over the last ten years I’ve often wondered when and how ParmaDaze would actually end.

Surely this couldn't go on forever, at some point we’ve got to close the book on this little quest... right?

ParmaDaze started as a way to keep in touch with a group of mates after a fire took away Ascot Vale’s Prince of Wales Hotel - our Wednesday parma night home for many years previous.  

But as much as we all hate to admit it times change, 10 years is a hell of a long time, and for the last 12 months or so weekly attendance at parma night has been dwindling, to the point where only four of all of the parmas we reviewed in 2019 had more than 3 attendees, considering that when we started we would easily crack 15 reviewers every week that is quite a drop in numbers. 

Now I want to be clear that I hold no ill will to any and all of the review team who have dropped off of late. This isn’t a guilt trip. Free time, commitments and all round life changes for everyone and expecting weekly attendance to my mad little scheme for ten goddamn years was a ridiculous ask, and a massive thank you for coming even once to give your opinions on some parmas.

So when I saw that Parma 400 and our 10 year anniversary amazingly coincided on the same week I took it as a sign from the universe that it was time to wrap things up, Which is why this week’s review #400 finished where we began 10 years prior. Starting and ending at Mrs. Parmas seemed like an amazingly fitting end to this journey.

Reviewing these parmas every week for ParmaDaze has been a major part of my life, and even now part of me is crying out to keep it going forever. Flicking through Instagram this last couple of weeks it has been triggering a weird tinge of sadness every time I get tagged in a decent looking parma and think to myself “Oh I’ll have to add that to the list” before reminding myself that “the list” is no more. 

Man this got depressing quick. 

So what’s next?

Well first up I’m not disappearing, and definitely not stopping both eating parmas and giving my opinions on them. All of the social media sites will remain and I’ll no doubt chuck the occasional review up on Instagram, share interesting parma news on Facebook and share my thoughts on Video Games or assault companies for tech support on Twitter (hell with all this extra free time I might even be able to get the occasional video review out on the dusty old YouTube channel).

Really the only thing that is gonna stop is the weekly long form blog update, and I’ll be sure to keep the archive of existing blog posts live for as long as humanly possible. I worked for 10 frickin' years on those posts, I’m not gonna let them disappear!

On top of that we have something new in the works. I’m not ready to release all of the details just yet - But know the term “PD 2.0” is getting thrown around a lot. I don’t want to put a specific date on it, but I should have something concrete to share some time in the coming months. I’m pretty excited about it and I think it’s going to be something really cool. 

Now it's time for some thankyous. As I touched upon earlier a massive thanks to everyone who pitched in a score to ParmaDaze over the years - I couldn’t have done it without the contributors so big thanks to you all. Thanks to my wife, Reviewer Nikki, for putting up with me for all this time and being the best partner and/or designated driver a guy could ask for. Oh and a special mention to Reviewer “Savage" Stefo as well - The bloke who, behind Nikki and Myself, came to more reviews than anyone else. A true champion for the cause. 

Thanks to the pubs for putting up with us. I’ve said some relatively nasty stuff about some of you over the years, I hope none of it was taken too seriously, it was all a bit of fun - Except that one pub that tried to sue us, but they are under new management now so I’m not gonna name them.

Specifically thanks to the Birmingham Hotel, the Imperial Hotel and all of the other golden chook winners for humouring us any time we rolled in to present the poor unsuspecting staff with chicken trophies. You guys were always good sports. 

Oh and thanks to the Prince of Wales hotel in Ascot Vale. To Parma Pete, Tony and Chris for putting together the greatest pub meal that has ever graced this earth. Still missed to this day, we looked for a parma to replace yours for ten goddamn years and, although we had some damn good feeds in that time, still came up short. In my mind you still remain the best we’ve ever had. 

And finally, thanks to you! ParmaDaze could not of existed without the support of the readers coming back every week to read my chicken scratch. Being “The ParmaDaze Guy” has afforded some amazing opportunities (I’m gonna be bragging that I was interviewed for the Wall Street Journal for decades to come), and most importantly has been an absolute blast. So. much. fun. 

And so - After 10 years, four hundred reviews, thousands of pints and a countless chickens its finally time to say...

The search is over.

#400 - 'Mrs. Parmas'

Where - 25 Little Bourke St. Melbourne

Price - $27.50 for a chicken parma (any variety), $30 for Veal, $24.50 for Eggplant

Website - http://www.mrsparmas.com.au

Reviewers - Adam Y, Carly, Daniel, Eden, Fridge, Kim, Lee, Maree, Matt, Nikki, Pat, Rob, Shanan, Stefo & Tony

Mrs Parmas was the pub that started it all. You all know the story by now but after a fire at The Prince of Wales in Ascot Vale, the home of the perfect parma, we kicked off our hunt to find a replacement weekly feed that would fill the POW parma sized hole in our hearts.

That was 400 reviews ago. 400 reviews and 10 years to the day since our first visit to Mrs. Parmas.

So what better way to celebrate our 400th review than by heading back to where it all began? Sure we did a revisit in 2012 but it has still been a good seven or eight years since I had set foot in Mrs. Parmas for a feed. Had things changed at all? It was time to find out. So, for the 400th time, we loaded up the parma bus and headed to Little Bourke Street.

Our question was answered pretty damn quickly - No. As far as the appearance of Mrs. Parmas goes it looks exactly as it did 10 years ago. Right down to the “Satay Parma”, which I believe was the parma on the specials board back then as it was this past weekend.

But there’s nothing wrong with that - They’ve got a winning formula at Mrs. Parmas. I said in our 2010 review that I appreciated the lack of pretension that Mrs. Parmas exhibited for a pub in the middle of the CBD and I stand by that. Its a great spot to relax, grab a beer and apparently kill time between acts 1 and 2 of Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, as when we arrived the place was packed with throngs of people in Gryffindor and Slytherin scarves smashing parmas before heading back to finish the performance.

We grabbed a seat and checked the massive parma menu that loomed on the wall above…

Inflation has definitely hit Mrs. Parmas, chicken parma prices rising $4 since our last visit. I was very tempted by some of the novelty options on offer at Mrs. P’s, however to keep things on a level playing field I opted for the original, with some of the other group being a bit more adventurous and trying some of the other, fancier options.

As far as beers go its hard to fault Mrs. Parmas. Since opening their doors they’ve had a philosophy of being an all-Victorian beer bar, exclusively stocking only 100% Victorian microbrewery beer, and it definitely wasn’t a short list. on tap they had their own “Mrs’ P’s Lager”, Fury & Son, Stomping Ground, Kaiju, Fixation, Cavalier, 2 Brothers and pages more in either bottle or can. Can’t fault them here and, parmas aside, worth stopping in just for a beer.

20 or so minutes after ordering our parmas started filing out of the kitchen. It was a big turnout this week, with 15 people in our crew it look a bit of time for everyone’s food to arrive, so have to cut them a bit of slack as it was such a large order.

If you like continuity in your life then there’s no place better than Mrs. Parmas. It has been 10 years and their parmas look exactly the same today as they did in 2010.

Its a unique style that you don’t see very often. Rather than going for thickness (which, I will admit, scores well at ParmaDaze), Mrs. P’s is a flat schnitzel, opting for plate real estate over thickness, which definitely helps with an even cook as all of Mrs. Parmas schnitzels are pan fried rather than deep fried.

And they’re pretty tasty! the chicken breast was pure white and juicy, the crumbs were a little soggy but packed with herbs, really adding to the flavour profile of the dish.

The toppings were pretty solid as well. Solid coverage of cheese grilled to perfection, and a healthy serve of flavoursome ham that really nailed the flavours of a good parma.

As far as criticisms go I could have used a bit more napoli, and mine did come out a little on the cold side, but again I attribute that to trying to wrangle 15 parmas out of the kitchen at the same time.

I always say that novelty toppings on parmas are great as long as they can produce a solid standard parma, and Mrs. Parmas delivers just that. They don’t use the novelty toppings as a crutch to hide a poor schnitzel, they use a quality schnitzel and build on top of it. The result is a unique yet traditional parma that I’d happy have again any day of the week.

Now on to the sides, where things get … controversial.

If you are unaware Mrs. Parmas have a shared sides system. The parmas come out as pictured above, on a big plate, all alone. Then you are delivered your sides - A bowl of salad and a bowl of chips - However they aren’t your chips and salad - They are the communal chips and salad for the table.

And for 10 years the shared sides at Mrs. Parmas has been their biggest issue.

The sides are good! The chips are hot, liberally salted with chicken salt, crunchy on the outside and crisp on the inside - Honestly top notch chips, and the salad is everything you would want from a garden salad to break up your meal a little.

Rather than re-tread the same content, I’ll just copy a paragraph that I wrote when we visited in 2012

The whole act of sharing two bowls of chips between seven people is just awkward. Sure we’re all friends, but putting communal chips brings up all sorts of social questions - are fingers okay? What if I take too many and don’t leave enough for everyone else? who gets the last chip? can I put sauce on them?

To keep the obscure movie references going I felt like I was in a cruel “Cube“-like social experiment where one wrong move could get my face burned off with acid.

First of all, how good is Cube? Such a good movie and still holds up.

Secondly, the sentiment above still stands. I feel like the experience at Mrs. Parmas gets less enjoyable the more people you have in your party as the more people you have the more the shared sides system is exacerbated. We had 15 people in our party and we were served with three bowls of chips and three bowls of salad, and they were emptied within minutes, leaving some people in our group who didn’t act fast enough without anything.

Now, I have always been told that refills on chips and salad are free, last trip we didn’t say anything and waited to see if we were offered a refill … that refill never came. So this time around we actually asked for a refill of our chips.

And to Mrs. Parmas credit, they came, three (smaller) bowls of chips were delivered to the table - However it took them a good 15 minutes to arrive. The extra chips arrived after we had finished our parmas, after the staff had cleared our plates.

I’ll go deeper in this in the “Value” discussion below, but for $27.50 shared sides just seems like a bit of a rip off and after 3 reviews of Mrs. Parmas now it still doesn’t sit well with us.

And now for some thoughts from the others around the table …

“Parma was okay, Shared salad and chips no good.”

— Rob

“Shared sides is a downer. Company was great. Good times!”

— Shanan

“Chicken was good, might have been an alright meal if they didn’t make us share chips and salad. Rort for $27.50.”

— Daniel

“Parma was good but pretty pricey. Overall an expensive meal. ”

— Tony

“ Shit show, who the f@$k serves chips and salad between a table of 15 by 3 bowls of each to share.”

— Fridge

“I hate sharing ... especially food!”

— Stefo

“Parmageddon was extremely hot. I was looking forward to a spicy meal but “kick” what a kick I wouldn’t like to think what the “supergeddon” would be.”

— Adam Y

“A tasty parma, other than being a bit cold it was hard to fault. Shared sides still causing dramas 10 years later. ”

— Nikki

So … yeah, A lot of strong opinions on the shared sides.

Funnily enough while we were eating our meals a table of six sat down behind me and I overheard one of them say to the other “now, the parmas are good but they do something weird with the chips” - confirmation its not just us that thinks its an off-putting system.

The value score definitely took a hit because of it. I’d consider a $27.50 parma expensive at the best of times, but a $27.50 parma with shared sides? its a turn off that harms an otherwise great meal.

I think I could live with shared salads. Leaving salad on your plate is pretty common, not everyone eats it and in the interest of reducing food waste I reckon I could get behind a bowl of salad and personal chips … but c’mon. Chips are integral to the parma experience and forcing us to share is just cruel and unusual.

I really like Mrs. Parmas. I like the venue, I like the all Victorian tap list and I really enjoy the parmas they push out. They’re one of the only pubs in Melbourne that offer a gluten free parma and they have the option for eggplant parmas on all of their novelties so its easily one of the most enjoyable by everyone parma venues out there. It’s just a shame that every time we go we get bogged down in this shared sides debacle. At the very least this trip we confirmed that you can get a free refill if you request it, it may be like getting blood from a stone… but it is possible.

I’d say every parma fan needs to visit Mrs. Parmas at least once. They do some interesting stuff, and if you can get over the shared sides (as we clearly can’t) then they put out a solid feed.

Thanks for sticking with us for 400 reviews!!

Parma - 7.14

Chips - 3.82

Salad - 3.95

Value - 5.23

Total -  5.45

The search continues...

#399 - 'Macelleria'

Where - 21-31 Hall St. Moonee Ponds

Price - $22.90

Website - https://macelleria.com.au

Reviewers - Lee & Nikki

I first saw Macelleria on an Instagram post, advertising themselves as “The Butcher that cooks for you!”, and as much as I love a good parma there is always room in my world for a quality cut of steak.

An interesting concept, upon approaching the counter to place your order at Macelleria you are greeted with this lovely sight…

Pick your steak, pick your done-ness, pick your sauce, pick your sides, pick your beer. Delightful.

So when I heard that Macelleria also had a parma on the menu I was torn. Do I visit the steakhouse and get a steak or do I visit a steakhouse and get a parma? Chances are the parma is on the menu just to keep the steak haters who get dragged along happy - Could it really be any good?

But as much as I enjoy a good steak we are duty bound. We strapped on a blindfold so we wouldn’t be tempted by the glass case of steaks, blindly groped our way up to the counter and placed our order.

This week we tried the Moonee Ponds location, but there are also Macelleria’s in Richmond, Glen Waverly, Geelong and in Bondi & Newtown Sydney.

So this is how the parma is described on the menu -

That’s right. Schnitzel and eggplant. Definitely something we haven’t encountered before. Feels super traditional yet unique at the same time. As far as prosciutto goes I am a massive fan - I don’t think I’ve encountered a prosciutto parma I didn’t like.

I was definitely worried, this one could go either way.

The tap list is pretty sparse, but as this is more of a restaurant than a pub they can be forgiven I guess. Kombi Lane Lager, Peroni, Asahi Super Dry and Mountain Goat Steam Ale. There are some more options available in stubbies/cans but nothing overly craft focussed.

After a 15 minute wait I spied our parmas coming out of the kitchen…

First things first - Macelleria needs to invest in bigger plates. Sure a plate overflowing with stuff makes for a good looking photo, but it also makes eating the damn thing a bit of an exercise. Luckily we were supplied with some hefty steak knives to help facilitate, which we used to tuck straight in to the parma in front of us.

The schnitzel buried under the mountain of toppings was actually surprisingly good! A little bit on the small side however that’s where my criticisms of it pretty much end. Super crunchy (an impressive feat given the sheer mass of stuff on top). Flavoursome, well cooked and good quality chicken. A solid foundation all around.

When I saw the menu I was worried about the eggplant. I’m not the biggest eggplant fan at the best of times and in my mind I felt like it would serve no purpose other than just getting in the way - and I was wrong in that assumption.

I didn’t love the eggplant, but I didn’t dislike it. It definitely helped to bulk out the small-ish schnitzel to a meal I had trouble finishing in one sitting, and it even added an almost sun-dried tomato feel to the flavour profile. I won’t be protesting that every other parma in Melbourne add a slice of eggplant any time soon, but I was unoffended by its inclusion here.

The other toppings were spot on. The prosciutto lent the parma its signature salty bite and the napoli worked well mixing with the eggplant. The mozzarella was well melted and the splash of parmesan on top added a dash of extra flavour.

The big serving of chips was well seasoned and pretty tasty, however with such a small plate I couldn’t really manoeuvre the parma around so I could get to them quick enough before turning mostly cold. The ones I could access at the start of the meal were fantastic, though

Definitely a generous serving of salad on this parma. Italian influences shine through again with the inclusion of olives throughout, which were a nice surprise if you like olives. If you don’t like olives I guess they would be less than well received. Other than that there were cherry tomatoes, cucumber slices, onion slivers and lettuce leaves. Overall a tasty salad and a fine accompaniment to the parma.

“Delicious, crunchy schnitzel and it was great to have a parma that wasn’t tight with the napoli in what feels like months. I thought the eggplant would bother me, but it turned out to be a nice addition. Worth trying!”

— Nikki

$22.90 is a pretty damn good price for the parma we received. We’ve had parmas much more expensive this year with much less on the plate. I wouldn’t complain about having to pay this again. No parma nights on the books as far as I can see.

There is a lot going on with the Macelleria parma. For a parma that I thought would be an afterthought on a steakhouse menu I was shocked at the amount of effort that was put in to make this an interesting dish. The traditional flavours might not be for everyone, but if you’re a bit adventurous (and can avoid the temptation to order yourself a thick, juicy steak) you won’t be disappointed.

Parma - 7.75

Chips - 6.00

Salad - 6.75

Value - 7.50

Total -  7.15

The search continues...

#398 - 'Republic Tavern'

Where - 250 Cooper St. Epping

Price - $26

Website - https://republictavern.com.au

Reviewers - Lee & Nikki

When I first heard about Republic Tavern my initial thought was “Epping … Where is Epping again?”

Then after a quick trip on Google maps I realised its actually not that far, and a trip to Epping might be a great idea for something different, and I can renew my Costco membership while I’m there because who doesn’t need a 5 kilo pack of cream cheese.

So on Thursday we loaded into the car and headed out to the Republic Tavern.

We parked in the carpark for the Mantra hotel, which looms over the pub (it’s actually a nice looking hotel) and headed inside - The first thing that hit me was the sheer size of the place - Absolutely huge with multiple seating options, a pool table and even a little beer garden out the side.

We grabbed a seat and checked the menu -

Now as you may have guessed Republic Tavern is a brewery as well as a pub, offering up a full selection of brews from both the Beer Republic line of beers, as well as a full range of non Beer Republic beers, which I thought was nice. A lot of brewpubs lock you into one brand of beer, so it was nice to have the option to stray from the flagship a little.

Too many beers to mention by name, but just know that there is a top notch craft beer selection on offer. The Passionfruit Twist and Raspberry Sour were both fantastic.

About 15 minutes after ordering (it was pretty quick) our parmas arrived…

The schnitzel was top quality. A little overcooked and the advertised “parmesan crumb” wasn’t really detectable, they just tasted like standard crumbs to me - But otherwise this was a quality schnitzel.

Pure white chicken breast, juicy enough and although the crumbs weren’t particularly parmesan-y they had a solid crunch. A fine foundation for a parma.

The toppings were a bit of a mixed bag. Plenty of cheese, well grilled and gooey along with some smoked ham, I just wish a bit more flavour shone through. It was all good, but it just didn’t have any kick.

The biggest downfall of the toppings was the napoli - There just wasn’t any. I investigated under the cheese & ham and there were some remnants of tomato paste but we couldn’t really taste it at all amongst the massive serve of cheese atop the dish.

But overall a good dish, quality ingredients and (mostly) expertly assembled, just look at that cross section up there, isn’t that a nice looking cross section?

I’m not normally one who enjoys shoestring fries, but the chips offered up at Republic were nothing short of outstanding. Yes, they fall into the standard trappings of shoestrings (ie. they go cold in minutes), but other than that they were well seasoned, there were plenty of them and the aioli that was served with the chips for dippage was an almost exact replica of McDonalds Big Mac sauce. Absolutely delicious.

The salad was also pretty good. Heaps of it, plenty of stuff going on inside (especially if you are a cherry tomato fan) and tossed in a heavy pour of dressing. The leaves felt a little bit wilted but not insanely so, all up a quality side to the parma.

“Good chicken, good toppings, great chips. Could have been a fantastic parma had they not been so tight with the napoli!”

— Nikki

$26 is a bit on the pricey side for what we received but I’m not too distressed. If I had to price it I’d say it was a $22-$23 parma (the schnitzel was a bit small all things considered). I can’t see any parma nights on the books but that doesn’t mean there isn’t one on the way for this relatively new spot.

The Republic Tavern is a few tweaks away from being fantastic, just crank up the “parmesan crust” advertised to be in the crumbs and switch up the napoli to something chunkier and they are well on their way to a top tier feed. Keep the Big Mac sauce with the chips though - that is a winner.

Republic is a good spot, a little bit far out for me to visit with any regularity (other than stopping in for a quick pint after a trip to Costco), but definitely a worthwhile watering hole for those out that way. Give it a crack if you are in the area.

Parma - 7.00

Chips - 8.50

Salad - 7.00

Value - 7.00

Total -  7.30

The search continues...

Crossing the Road #10 - 'Godfather's'

Where - 200-202 Buckley St. Essendon

Price - Standard parma - $20.90, novelty toppings - $22.90

Website - None that I can find, but they do have a Facebook page

Back in my day this end of Buckley Street had one restaurant and one restaurant alone - Goofy’s Pizza. They were dirty, they were oily, but they were open ‘till like 3am and I’ll be damned if telling the cab driver to stop off for a quick Goofy’s on the way home wasn’t an integral part of the Prince of Wales Friday night experience.

Now luckily Goofy’s still stands, but now they have a bit of competition. The ill fated but delicious Dude Food Man moved in across the road for a while, I noticed last night that there’s a place called “Indian Tukka” that, while a little culturally confused, seems to be pretty good and two or three doors up from Goofy’s themselves is tonights target. Godfather’s Pizzeria.

I remember Godfather’s as a pretty prolific pizza chain when I was a kid. There were never any within delivery range to me so I don’t really remember their pizza however I do remember them being “around” a lot in the late 90’s early 00’s before kind’ve disappearing? I may be wrong but until I was recommended Godfather’s for review a couple of weeks ago I had kind’ve forgotten they existed all together.

If you cast your memory back to the last time we did a Crossing the Road, you’ll remember that in a fit of disappointment at the parma delivery systems offered by Menulog and Uber Eats I kind’ve denounced the whole idea of home delivered parmas, and to be honest I wasn’t planning on doing another one for a long time, so when I heard about Godfather’s actually looking relatively decent I decided we would try a new tactic this time around. Rather than leave the fate of our parmas in the hands of a random Uber driver we would place the take away order, then go and pick it up from the store ourselves. A little bit more effort, but hopefully then we can treat our dinner with care before we get it home.

In a very retro feeling move I called them as we got in the car and placed our order. Now Godfather’s offers quite a range of novelty options …

Feeling a bit spicy this week I went for the “Hot n Tasty Parma” (although the Sujuk parma sounded mighty tempting) while Reviewer Nikki opted for something a little bit simpler with the Aussie Parma.

When I called through the order we were told the parmas would be 15 minutes, it took us about 12 minutes to get there and I had to wait 3 minutes once arriving before the parmas were ready, so their 15 minute estimate was pretty spot on.

We grabbed the parmas, hurried to the car and rushed them home, taking about another 12 minutes to get home with the parmas warm on my lap.

We got home and quickly unpacked our parcel on the coffee table.

Now in a normal “Crossing the Road” I would take the time to plate up the parmas for some good glamour shots, however this week our focus was about getting those parmas into our bellies while they were still piping hot and un-tainted by the delivery process, so rather than faff about we did what had to be done and tucked straight in.

I think we did pretty well! Other than the chips being a tad soggy the parmas were still nice and hot when we cracked open the foil containers and tucked in.

The schnitzel was super crispy - Other than the crumbs being slightly thicker than what I would like on a good parma the thicker crumbs lended themselves to a strong crunch with each bite, and I think actually helped retain the freshness in a parma that had to travel. The chicken was big enough, a little dry but not overly so. Pure chicken breast, nice and thick - Definitely tasty and as far as take away parmas go one of the better schnitzels we have had.

As far as the toppings go I can only speak for the Hot n Tasty parma, but I will say that the title of the dish is not false advertising as this parma was both Hot “n” Tasty. They weren’t at all tight with the salami or the jalapeños, plenty to go around throughout the entire meal. Not a parma for the feint of heart either as they definitely brought the heat.

Reviewer Nikki seemed satisfied with her Aussie, other than the egg being slightly smooshed during transport (nobody to blame but myself on that one) it definitely hit the spot.

As I said earlier the chips were a little soggy after transport, but looking past that there was quite a hefty serving. That is one thing I’ll give take away parmas over pub parmas - More often than not they’ll cram that foil tray with chips, many more than you’d get at a pub feed. They were well cooked, well seasoned and flavourful.

Are salads from pizza joints ever any good? I mean, this one wasn’t bad by any means, but after marinating in the hefty pour of dressing for a good 20 minutes by the time I got to it the leaves were hardly at their freshest. It was fine, but nothing to write home about - definitely would have been better fresh.

I’d happily shell out another $22.90 for this parma on a lazy night. I can’t see any official parma nights advertised on their facebook site, but as they only opened in November last year I wouldn't rule out something going on the books soon!

As the photo I snapped of the interior above shows there are tables and chairs available at Godfather’s so the option to eat in is there if you want it, and to be honest I don’t think that would be a bad option. As much as I talk up the ease of picking up a parma on the way past there’s no way what we had last night could top eating it fresh in house.

That being said, if you live close to a Godfather’s, can’t be bothered cooking dinner and feel like grabbing a cheeky parma on the way home from work you could do a lot worse than what they have on offer. The novelty toppings kept things interesting on what was a quality foundation to the dish.

I’m still mad at home delivered parmas and doubt I’ll be firing up the Uber Eats app to grab one any time soon, but I think making the effort to pick it up myself then enjoy it on the comfort of my couch is a good compromise, and something I would definitely try again.

The search continues...

#397 - 'The Cornerstone'

Where - 1 Crockford Street, Port Melbourne

Price - $24

Website - https://www.thecornerstonepub.com.au

Reviewers - Lee & Nikki

This review is gonna start with an embarrassing admission. I’m not gonna sugar coat it, I’m not gonna dace around it. Deep breath. Here we go…

I watch The Bachelor.

To clarify, I don’t watch The Bachelorette, that would be ridiculous. However when Matt Agnew flashed those astrophysicist pearly whites of his in July last year I was enthralled. I could not tear my eyes from the TV, and when I sat in an emotional heap at the end of each episode I would need a few minutes to regain my composure, and some nights a second TV show would follow the Bachelor. A show made in Melbourne, starring Lucy Lawless as a spritely detective trying to balance the pressures of both solving horrific murders and being a mordern woman in 2019. The show was (is? I don’t think it has been cancelled yet) called “My Life is Murder”, and while not as enthralling as The Bachelor, sometimes I’d get roped into the plot and I caught a few episodes.

Now bear with me here, but in the show Lucy Lawless had a restaurant/pub she would visit a lot. She was friendly with the owner, she would discuss cases with Bernard Curry (who I had a theory was actually dead the entire time, but that didn’t actually pan out) and just generally hang out in this pub. Being someone who has visited a lot of Melbourne pubs it bugged the hell of me that I just couldn’t place where it was shot. It did look very “Port Melbourne” but for the longest time I could not place just where in Melbourne the My Life is Murder pub existed.

Then I was suggested the Cornerstone, I checked some photos and new instantly that we had found the MLIM pub, and there was no doubt that a parma there was top priority.

The pub is not exactly as it appears in the show, apparently since production the Cornerstone has added a row of plus booths by the window. A nice touch and definitely adds to the overall pub vibe of the place. It’s a spacious, open and well lit establishment with a great view of a bustling little Port Melbourne community out the window.

We grabbed a table, checked the menu and was greeted by one of the most delicious descriptions of a parma I’ve read in the longest time…

Doesn’t that just sound delicious?

We placed our order at the bar and grabbed some beers to go alongside. Not a bad selection at the Cornerstone, I posted the tap list below which doesn’t seem to be entirely up to date as I grabbed a pint of Blue Moon to accompany my parma, but everything else on tap seems to have been on the board…

The parmas arrived at our table about 15-20 minutes after ordering and at first glance it looked like we were on to a winner…

The schnitzel was absolutely outstanding, apart from being ever so slightly overcooked and a little dry, it was thick and plump, hand crumbed with strong garlic flavours throughout. To be honest eating the little edge chunks that didn’t have a lot of toppings on them reminded me a lot of tucking in to my second favourite chicken dish - Chicken Kiev.

An outstanding foundation to a parma and a very strong start to the dish.

The toppings were a bit of a mixed bag but mostly positive. Plenty of cheese grilled to a delicious golden brown (like I said, maybe a little bit too grilled, but that’s a minor quibble) and the Virginia ham was strong and flavoursome.

The napoli, while fresh and home made as claimed in the menu description, was in pretty short supply. Another spoonful or two and this parma would be in the upper echelons. It would have added an extra burst of flavour and even helped with the slight dryness of the chicken. It was still damn good, but it could have been outstanding.

After we de-parma’ed the chips we found a pretty generous serving hiding under the schnitzel. Like the parma a little overcooked but otherwise very tasty - Dusted with a seasoning reminiscent of BBQ crisps, very similar to the chips we had last year at Melba Social in Kensingon. Very tasty.

The salad was a dense little pile of leaves an onion slices. Very well dressed, and I think I detected a heavy helping of parsley throughout? Either way it was quite tasty and a great foil to the strong flavours of the parma. A fine side for a fine meal.

“Loved the schnitzel and chips, just could have used a little more napoli on mine and it would have been amazing. ”

— Nikki

I’ve got no issues shelling out $24 for the Cornerstone parma. Some minor complaints aside this was a delicious feed with top notch ingredients, if you are still on the fence Tuesday is $20 Parma & Pot night - A great value deal that would be hard to fault.

I enjoyed this parma immensely, the food was fantastic and the atmosphere of the pub is perfect for a modern backstreets local. So whether you love a good parma or are just a massive Xena: The Warrior Princess fan, the Cornerstone is definitely worth checking out.

Parma - 7.75

Chips - 8.50

Salad - 8.00

Value - 7.00

Total -  7.80

The search continues...

Special Attempt - 'Tour De Hobart #2'

It has been a hot minute since we have ventured down to Tasmania!

Our last visit was back in 2014, when our first Tour De Hobart took place, and I was definitely curious to see how the Tassie parma scene had changed in the nearly 6 years since we last set foot on ol’ Van Diemen’s Land, so last Friday (chucked a sickie for an extra long weekend) we boarded a ridiculously early Jetstar flight and headed down south to see what Hobart had on offer once again.

Parma #1 - The Shamrock Hotel

I’ve got a soft spot for the Shamrock. I would say its my second favourite pub in Hobart (behind the Shipwright’s Arms Hotel). It’s a cozy, friendly local that gets surprisingly packed at lunchtime.

Now this is already gonna be a long post so I’ll try and cut down on the fluff. We grabbed a seat at the Shammy and checked the menu -

Just look at those prices. Absolute bargain, although I’m not quite sure what makes a seafood basket “Turbo”.

Our last visit to the Shamrock I was accidentally served a pepperoni parma. Well, might as well make it official this time around and actually order a pepperoni parma. We placed our order at the bar, waited for our parmas to arrive and about 15 minutes later the meals appeared from the kitchen…

Starting off strong! The schnitzel was home made, thick and super juicy. The second I saw it I did regret not shelling out the extra cash to “monster size” this one as it was a little bit small, however for only fifteen freakin’ dollars I’m not complaining in the slightest.

The salami was a welcome touch however I was yearning for a little bit more heat - And here is something I noticed this weekend - Tasmanian pubs love hot sauce. Every pub we visited this trip (both the ones we had a parma at and the ones we just stopped in at for a beer) had a large selection of hot sauces sitting by the bar. I’m talking 5 - 10 bottles minimum. Its one of those things that you don’t notice until you notice it - but every Tassie pub seems to have a treasure trove of hot sauce, and the Shamrock had at least twenty.

I grabbed a bottle of Frank’s Red Hot that was sitting amongst the collection and it really brought the pepperoni parma to life. Absolutely delicious.

Chips were hot, well seasoned and crispy however the serving size was pretty minimal. Definitely could have used another handful.

The salad was middling, I appreciated the seperate bowl and beetroot slice however I could have used a lot more dressing. It was fresh, just uninspired.

All of my above criticisms of the Shamrock parma can be negated by the statement “It was just fifteen dollars”. If you don’t feel like pepperoni on your parma the traditional is just $12.50. Absolute bargain and I can now see why the place gets so packed out at lunchtime.

I’ve been before and I’ll definitely stop in again.

PARMA #2 - THE BOARDWALK BISTRO @ WREST POINT

So for our weekend in Hobart we stayed at Wrest Point Casino. Our last visit to Wrest Point we tried the once-great-now-horrible parma at their upstairs restaurant known as The Loft (you can read about it here).

Well (unsurprisingly if the quality of the parma we had last time was any indication … I’m not bitter or anything) The Loft is no more. Ditched for a Chinese Restaurant, leaving the waterfront bistro known as “The Boardwalk” as the only spot in the complex one can get their parma on.

It was lunchtime on Saturday and after a big breakfast at the buffet and with dinner plans at a decent nearby restaurant (Ristorante Da Angelo - Highly recommended) I just wanted to grab something small to fill my tum tum between meals.

As I didn’t want too big of a meal I opted for the “regular” sized parma, and after being bamboozled into signing up for membership on check in (it was free, just time consuming and no doubt I’m gonna get swamped with spam emails in the future) I managed to get parma #2 the $19 price tag. Also I went with the Chips & Slaw option, so the exact nature of “new potatoes” will forever remain a mystery.

Okay so even though it was under twenty bucks I feel like the “its okay because its cheap” excuse can only be stretched so far. I know I ordered the “regular” sized parma but this thing was tiny, about the size of a McCain personal pizza. The schnitzel was pretty bad quality, Dry and cheap with a seam of gristle running up one side that was a bit of a stomach-turner

The toppings were fine, nice browning on the cheese and the slice of ham was appreciated but overall it all felt pretty cheap and phoned in.

The chips were actually a high point. Served out from underneath the parma (it’d actually be impressive to see them try and get all the chips under the parma, considering the size of the thing) they were hot, crispy, well seasoned and plenty of them.

It was cheap, over-mayo’ed and a pretty small serve but I didn’t hate the coleslaw. If anything a bit of the coleslaw on the same fork as a slice of parma helped to lift a quite shitty parma up into mediocrity. I think I just like coleslaw with parmas so I am a little biased.

As you would expect from a casino the parma at the Boardwalk is the cheapest thing they could possibly throw together and still call it a parma. I reckon all up there is about $2.50 worth of ingredients here that they are peddling for $19. I think you can earn a free parma by accruing enough membership points - and “meh, its free” would be the only condition under which I’d recommend this parma.

Go to the Shippies instead - It’s nearby, $2 cheaper and much, much better.

PARMA #3 - HOBART HISTORIC CRUISES

Our mighty vessel

Okay so I know this one isn’t technically a parma, but in the world of novelty parma toppings what is a parma if not chicken schnitzel with some sort of flavour sauce dumped on top. It’s a bit of a stretch, but we’re doing this.

There’s a long story on how we ended up on this dinner cruise that I won’t bore you with, but the main points you need to know are this - It’s $59 per person for a 3 course meal and a drink (1st course is a choice between garlic bread and spring rolls, dessert is a choice between chocolate pudding and lemon tart and main is a choice from the below menu -

We boarded our swift vessel and headed off into the bay.

The garlic bread was standard bake-at-home roll fare, It’s cheap and nasty but it kept us happy while the beers flowed.

Shortly after our mains arrived and, well …

Okay I’m not gonna rail too hard on them as the meal isn’t really what you are there for. The cruise itself was actually a lot of fun. The guy on the loudspeaker narrating points of interest as we passed was pretty entertaining and with an on board bar I could think of a lot worse ways to spend two hours.

Okay I’ve gotta talk about it a little bit.

The schnitzel was standard Coles/Woolies deli window fare, chucked in a fryer and on the plate. Nothing more, nothing less (and to be honest it was slightly better quality/bigger than the one from the casino).

When we placed our order for the schnitzel before boarding we were given the choice between “Gravy” and “Pepper Gravy”. The only difference being literally some cracked pepper on top of the pot of gravy before being served. But ya know what? It worked.

The potatoes were fine, I appreciated the butter on the side. The garden salad was not fine. No dressing, dry leaves, at least the Shamrock put it in a bowl.

Then after the schnitzel the lemon tart with ice cream came out as we were finishing up the trip and I’ll be damned if it wasn’t delicious.

It might have been the 5 or 6 stubbies of Cascade we downed over the course of the trip but, low quality schnitzel aside, I had a fun time on the cruise. It was charming. Keep your expectations low and you can be nothing but pleasantly surprised.

PARMA #4 - THE CUSTOMS HOUSE HOTEL

Monday rolled around and because someone decided that a 9:45pm flight out of Hobart back to Melbourne was a not at all dumb idea we had an afternoon to kill after our 11am checkout from the hotel.

Our original plan was to visit the famed Brunswick Hotel and their Wallaby parmas, however being the Australia Day public holiday at the time the Brunswick had opted not to open, so the next best thing we could find was the Customs House.

Situated directly across the street from where we boarded the dinner cruise, the Customs House is in a great spot to watch the comings and goings of Sullivans Cove.

We grabbed a seat in the bar and checked the (once again fantastically priced) menu…

I ordered a side of gravy with my parma and it still wasn’t over twenty bucks. Tasmania is doing something right when it comes to the pricing of their pub feeds.

Well we are definitely leaving things on a high note. The Customs House parma was absolutely fantastic.

First up the schnitzel was super thick, pure white chicken breast and cooked to utter perfection. Not overly crumbed and grilled to a spot on golden brown.

The toppings were plentiful, the napoli sauce was fresh, flavoursome and applied in abundance. A good, chunky sauce which I’d be very surprised if I discovered wasn’t made in house. Cheese melt was great too, good stretch and plenty of it, However I reckon this parma would have been an absolute killer if they had added a slice of ham. I know some corners would have to be cut to keep a parma like this at just $17, however even the option to add a slice of ham for a buck or two would have been greatly appreciated.

Yet another treasure trove of hot sauces greeted us at the Customs House.

The chips were great. Beer battered, crunchy, just how we like em. My only mistake was ordering a side of gravy as well as the included aioli because I just had too many dipping options and too few chips to dip. My ratios were all off and another handful of chips would have solved all my problems.

As for the salad, well now I know where the dressing from the previous two garden salads went - The Customs House stole it all. The garden salad was absolutely drenched in dressing, which is exactly how I like it, however I can see it being a little bit much for others, could probably back it off a little to find a happy medium.

The Customs House is a great spot to pull up a pew and watch the world go by, which is exactly what we did until our time in Hobart was up,we headed to the airport and back home to Melbourne.

Not counting the boat trip every parma we had in Hobart was at least under twenty bucks. Sure they varied in quality but it seems to be a bit of a rule of thumb to keep the prices low when it comes to bar meals.

As this was a Special Attempt we won’t be scoring these ones, however the Customs House was definitely the best of the weekend, followed closely by the Shamrock. There was entertainment value with the dinner cruise, cheap parma aside I actually had a great night. The Boardwalk at the Casino however had little to no redeeming value, of all the parmas we tried I’d say that is the one to avoid unless absolutely desperate.

Oh, I posted the above images on our Twitter earlier this week which friend of ParmaDaze @thebeerzilla turned into an image that I just have to share -

Spot on.

All up this was a fun weekend away, and just driving through the streets of Hobart I spotted so many more pubs I would love to try on a future trip. Fingers crossed it’s not another 6 years before we get back.

#396 - 'Penny Young'

Where - 22 Young St. Moonee Ponds

Price - $26

Website - http://pennyyoung.com.au/

Reviewers - Lee, Nikki & Stefo

And we’re back! Prepare for me to blow your mind-hole because we have officially started our tenth year of ParmaDaze. Review #1 - Mrs. Parmas was uploaded in March of 2010, which gives me two months to work out some sort of anniversary celebration (along with our four hundredth parma review in a few weeks time. We are just racking up the milestones in 2020!)

Anyway! New year, new parma and I wanted to kick off festivities with a pub I was very excited about.

Full disclosure - I love Penny Young. I have been a regular since they opened the bar and it has been one of my favourite spots in the area ever since. Starting as a craft beer bottle shop, Penny Young opened an attached beer hall in early 2018. The menu was very simple when they launched, limited to a selection of (delicious) wood fired pizzas - However when I heard over the break that they had recently added a parma to the menu I made it top priority to visit in the new year.

Penny Young started is life as a beer garden attached to a bottle shop - Now the Bottle Shop has moved a few doors down to a bigger fitout and left the beer garden attached to an empty storefront - I imagine the storefront is going to be absorbed Akira style into the beer hall, making it more of an indoor/outdoor setup, - But that remains to be seen.

We grabbed a table in the dining area and checked the menu for our first parma review of 2020…

We placed our orders at the bar, grabbed some pints of Boatrocker Sunshine & Rainbows Session sour (delicious, by the way) and headed back to our table.

As far as beers go you’re in luck because Penny Young has one of, if not the most impressive tap lists in the Northern suburbs. 18 taps of constantly rotating beers ensure that you never have to have the same beer twice, unless it is delicious, which most of them are. Too many beers to go into detail here, but check their Now Tapped page for a relatively up to date listing.

About 15 minutes after placing the order our parmas arrived at the table…

It looked good! At first glance the cheese could have been grilled a bit more and the schnitzel itself was a bit small, a look that was exacerbated by the oversized plate on which it was sitting, but size isn't everything and I would take a tasty smaller parma over a tasteless behemoth any day of the week.

We grabbed our cutlery and tucked in, the schnitzel was thick enough with a restrained coating of crumbs - However this is where we hit our biggest criticism of the Penny Young parma - The schnitzel was dry. so dry.

Not only was it dry but it was also barely hot. Bordering more on warm than anything else, I’ve got no facts to back this up but it felt as if the schnitzels were pre cooked only to be topped on demand, because the toppings were a completely different story…

… They were delightful! The cheese was steaming hot and melty. The pancetta in place of traditional ham was a welcome addition and added both flavour and a much appreciated crunch to the top of the dish. The napoli sauce was nothing special, looking suspiciously like it had come straight from a can, but it was hot, flavoursome and in this case I wouldn’t consider it a negative when paired with the other toppings on the parma. Such a shame the schnitzel underneath it was in the state it was.

Chips, like the toppings, were served piping hot and fresh. A large serve of steak cut beer battered chips, well seasoned and served almost completely out from underneath the parma. If they had’ve come with a dipping sauce they would be nearing perfection.

The garden salad, like the chips, was also generously served. Plenty of lettuce, tomato, onion and cucumber. If I had one gripe is that it was a little soggy from soaking in the dressing, but otherwise this was a top notch salad.

“I enjoyed the meal overall. The sides were tasty and the toppings flavorsome. The schnitzel sadly was not up to scratch. It was dry and only barely warm (perhaps precooked and reheated?). A quality schnitzel would have made this a top notch Parma!”

— Stefo

“Loved the chips, salad and toppings (the pancetta was an unexpected surprise!) However the schnitzel under it all was quite dry and served warm instead of hot. Could have been great but just fell short!”

— Nikki

In my mind this is a $22-$24 parma. $25 would be pushing it and the $26 they’re charging seems a little steep, not outrageously so, but rolling it back a dollar or two seems like a much better value proposition. Overall I enjoyed the dish but other than the pancetta I can’t claim that top notch ingredients were used all around, and it wasn’t the biggest of dishes. No parma nights on the books at this stage as far as I’m aware.

The Penny Young parma was one tweak away from kicking off our 2020 with a bang. The chips, the salad, the toppings, the pancetta, the beers on tap - All winners, yet they let us down on something as foundational as the schnitzel everything hinges on.

I’m hoping it was just an isolated incident and I get reports of different experiences once this review goes live. I’d even recommend it still worth checking out Penny Young as the meal as a whole was still quite enjoyable all told. Despite the issues I would happily go back … and I intend to.

Parma - 5.70

Chips - 8.33

Salad - 8.17

Value - 7.00

Total -  6.98

The search continues...

2019 Parma of the Year Awards

Happy New Decade everyone! By now I’d imagine most of us are back at work after the holiday break (ugh). Here we are in 2020. 2020. ParmaDaze started in March of 2010 so we are only three months away from our 10 year anniversary. Insane.

But before we forge ahead into the new decade lets take a look back at the year that was 2019. An interesting and fun year! Fat Yak named the best parma in the country, we did a roundup of all of the frozen parmas on the market, the Ascot Lot hosted an entire festival dedicated to the chicken parma, Coles released a surprisingly not entirely shit Chicken Parma Pizza, and I strapped on the apron to recreate an American Chicken Parmesan recipe which, like the Coles Parma Pizza, also turned out surprisingly good.

Oh, and I had a nervous breakdown watching cooked parmas sit under heat lamps for 40 minutes before getting plates up and served at the Corner Hotel rooftop.

As far as numbered reviews go we chalked up 30 new attempts in 2019. I’m not gonna lie, there was a lot of mediocrity in there  (not as bad as 2017, aka “the year of the stinkers”), but there were also some surprising standouts that I’d like to make sure get a mention before moving on to the big awards.

Now before we get started let me preface all of this by saying this is all personal opinion, a bit of fun and not to be taken too seriously - Everyone’s tastes are different and personal experiences at different places can fluctuate wildly. But these are the parmas we think deserve a mention from what we had in 2019 - If you’ve got a suggestion of somewhere you think is better feel free to suggest a parma here or use any of our other contact methods and we’ll do our best to visit it in 2020.

With that out of the way, on to the awards!

BEST PORTABLE PARMA

They did it. The crazy sons of bitches they actually did it.

Scientists have been working for decades on how to make a parma that you can eat standing up. They’ve put it in burgers, in wraps, in balls and in jaffles - But none have ever quite hit the mark. They’ve always been a little off from capturing the true essence of the parma.

Enter Jake’s Kitchen. an unassuming food truck we found at the Ascot Lot, and their chicken parma creation…

On a bed of crispy chips coated in “Jake’s special paprika seasoning” was a pre-sliced, super crispy chicken breast. slathered in gooey cheese and rich napoli sauce (I could do without the peas, tbh) they have created a sort of “Parma HSP” that really captured the essence of the parma without wrapping it in distracting hamburger buns or tortilla wraps.

They were the hit of the Parma Festival, with a queue over an hour long stretching the span of the food truck park. Absolutely insane. Definitely worth tracking them down for a visit.

BEST HOME DELIVERED PARMA

The Uber Eats explosion coupled with my increasing laziness as I continue my steady decline into being an old man meant we did more home delivered parmas than usual this year. Despite one too many cold and mis-delivered parmas being delivered utterly breaking me on the idea of Uber Eats delivered parmas all together, The parma from Eat Pizza in Glenroy stands out as the best we tried in 2020.

It wasn’t outstanding from a quality perspective. I mean, it was fine, however the big standout here is that entire meal pictured above (except for the beer) was only fifteen dollars. fifteen dollars for a metric crapload of food. The parma, chips and salad combined could easily feed two people. We normally do “biggest parma” and “best value parma” superlatives as well, but to be honest this home delivered parma from a pizza joint in Glenroy takes out those honours as well. Outstanding.

HONORABLE MENTIONS

There are two parmas we had this year that didn’t quite get a trophy, yet I wouldn’t feel right if they didn’t at least get a mention in the 2019 roundup, As they are both fantastic examples of a parma that you need to get out and try as soon as possible.

EASEY’S @ THE BOTTOM END

Its not traditional, It’s covered in powdered parmesan cheese, the napoli tastes like its half barbecue sauce, and you’d be a fool if you didn’t order it with a side of macaroni & cheese cubes. But I’ll be damned if the parma Easey’s put up at Collins Street’s The Bottom End wasn’t one of the most unique, interesting and flavoursome parmas of 2019.

The thick, ultra smoked ham. The caramelised, almost sweet texture on the crumbs, the thick high quality chicken schnitzel. It’s not a parma for everyone as it does a lot different, but I’d have this thing every day of the week. Try it asap.

ROBERT BURNS HOTEL

Boy we are really banging the “non traditional” drum this year, but the bone-in prosciutto, tomato and buffalo mozzarella parma from the Robbie Burns stands out as one of the best we had in 2019. Kind’ve the polar opposite of the Easey’s parma, which was like if McDonalds made a parma but good, the Robbie Burns parma feels like something that would come straight out of Nonna’s kitchen in the middle of Italy. It’s non traditional by way of being super traditional, if that makes any sense at all.

Not to mention the sides. I rate the Robbie Burns creamy mash as the best mashed potato I’ve had in my life, and I even got on board with the shoestring fries.

Now, being 150 metres from our 2019 Golden Chook winner you will definitely have a decision to make if you’re in the area, but they are such wildly different experiences I think there is still room for both to exist in such close vicinity. Worth a visit.

WEIRDEST PARMA

In a year of unique parmas crowning one as the “weirdest” definitely seems like putting a hat on a hat, but it wouldn’t be a 2019 wrap up without talking about this…

The chicken parma ice cream from Mr. Whippy, their offering at the Ascot Lot’s Parma-Rama festival.

I mean … What is there to say? It was soft serve ice cream covered in crushed chicken crimpy shapes. I stand by my theory that a mix of chicken, cheese & bacon and pizza shapes would have really captured that parma vibe over just chicken crimpy. C’mon guys. Put a bit of thought into your chicken parma ice cream, gosh.

BEST NEW PARMA

Alright! Its time to hand out some hardware. For newcomers the Best New Parma is the first of two awards we give out every year. Simply put the Best New Parma award goes to the best parma we ate in 2019. The highest scoring new addition to the list in the last 12 months, it was tight this year - I thought one of the two honourable mentions above would take out this award for the longest time, however they were pipped at the post by this year’s winner - North Melbourne’s Town Hall Hotel.

We first tried the Town Hall back in back in 2011, but we went with a few bacon haters in the group (I swear I didn’t know at the time, we have since ceased all contact) that dragged the score down significantly. So this year we gave it a second look and I’ll be damned if the rich, thick cut, smokey bacon on top of the Town Hall’s parma doesn’t launch it into the upper echelons of parmadom. Much like the Easey’s parma it is a bit of a divisive one, if you don’t like bacon this might not be the parma for you - However we thought it was absolutely outstanding.

I bet you thought the Mona Lisa was on display at the Louvre. Nope. North Melbourne.

In the interest of full disclosure we revisited yesterday to present the Town Hall the award and have a parma while we were at it and it was a little light on the rich, chunky napoli we enjoyed in October, I wouldn’t mind seeing a bit more of that going ahead, but it was still a damn tasty dish and worthy of the honours. It’s also a super cool, old school rock & roll pub that’s worth the visit just for the experience. Give it a crack.

PARMA OF THE YEAR

Is it even a surprise at this point? They’ve taken out the award the last three consecutive years and this year even Fat Yak backed up our decision by dubbing them Australia’s Best Parma.

For the fourth year in a row, massive congratulations to The Birmingham Hotel.

In February of 2019 I had a bit of a crisis. After presenting the Birmy with their 3rd Golden Chook got a little bit of press coverage a lot of negative comments filtered through claiming it was no longer as good as it once was.

My concern drove us to revisit the Birmy just to make sure the claims weren’t true and I’ve got to say I think it’s as good as ever. I know a lot of people are weirded out by the parma being served on a wooden board, but to be honest it doesn’t bother me all that much. For now the Birmy parma remains unbeaten in our eyes, and with this fourth consecutive Golden Chook they are now equal with The Imperial Hotel, who held the title from 2012 - 2015.

So congrats to the Birmy once again! Keep doing what you’re doing, and if you’re reading this and have yet to try a Birmy parma then head over asap and see what all the fuss is about … and if you’re a big eater stop by the Robbie Burns on the way out for a different, yet still amazing example of a parma.

And with that we wrap up 2019. Thanks for staying with us for yet another year. As I mentioned at the jump 2020 marks the 10 year anniversary of ParmaDaze. We’ve got some big things in the works so stay tuned for some announcements in the coming months.

Until then we are back on the search for the perfect parma! Stay tuned for new reviews coming every Friday as per usual, drop into the ParmaDaze Discord if you want to chat (I’m always there) or use the submission & contact buttons above if there’s a parma you’d like us to try!

Cheers, and the search continues…