Attempt #151 - 'Pacinos'

 

[info]When? - 18th of July, 2013

Where? - Pacinos Italian Family Restaurant. 300 Epsom Rd, Flemington

Price? - $22.90, $10 Parma Monday

Website? - http://www.pacinos.net.au/

Reviewers – Carly, Dale, Fridge, Lee, Tony S, Stefo[/info]

Never have we tried a pub with a fan base as loyal as Pacinos. I'm a little bit intimidated writing this review as I don't want to piss off the masses and wind up with a brick through my window. You can't turn on the news these days without seeing another report of blog related homicide.

Oh well, I'm leaving the country tomorrow morning, so here goes...

It starting with the voting, on a regular week the results of our facebook poll looks something like this -

Pretty standard, and that is votes collected over the course of seven days.

However when it came to Pacinos, Minutes after I put the poll online, the votes came flooding in, and we ended up with a result that looked like this...

Pretty decisive if you ask me! So it was set. We loaded up the parma bus and headed to Pacinos. Now regular readers will know that our usual parma night is Thursday night ... that's pretty much set in stone, Yet in researching Pacinos before we headed down I discovered that their parma night is Monday night, and (at face value at least) its quite a deal, $10 parmas with 13 different novelty varieties to choose from - word on the grapevine is that they pump out over 400 parmas every Monday, thats a lot of chooks!

The novelty menu, for those that are curious...

But novelty parmas aside, we were after the real deal and the real deal alone - so Thursday night we arrived at Pacinos, rocking up at around 7pm the place was already packed, we took our seats, ordered a beer, grabbed a menu and spied our target...

We placed the order and awaited our dinner. The other food coming out of the kitchen looked pretty quality, so I had high hopes. It was a bit of a wait before the meals arrived, but nothing terrible (especially considering how busy the place was).

Just like the other food, this parma looked impressive! The massive bird took up a majority of the plate, completely eclipsing the chips below (more on the chips later, but rest assured I saved them from their steamy prison moments after the plates dropped).

It was a big schnitzel of real, unprocessed chicken of a pretty decent thickness. The crumbs were sparse and soggy but herbed, which added a little flavour but some crunch would have been nice. Although being big and unprocessed the chicken itself was a bit dry and stringy, but not distractingly so.

There was no ham, which is pretty much standard at an Italian restaurant, as they seem to go the more 'traditional' parmigiana as opposed to the pub-ified version. Although its not a requirement for a good parma a bit of pork would have done this dish wonders.

Half of my parma was completely devoid of napoli, coupled with the lack of ham meant I was eating basically cheesy schnitzel for a fair portion of it, however that picked up halfway through, as apparently all my napoli was hanging out down one end, that end was much better.

There was plenty of cheese, perfectly golden brown, nothing amazing but it did its job, its hard to find fault with cheese!

Taste-wise it was okay, if anything a little bland, a common trait when you get to parmas of this size (I call it BPS or Big Parma Syndrome - It was explained in more detail here)

If my parma weren't big enough, for some reason it had a little parma-baby attached to the side as a bonus, I was already stuffed by the time I got to it, but I forced it down, I didn't want the little guy to feel left out.

Now, On to the chips - They were completely hidden in the original photo, So I made sure to snap a pick once they were removed (you can see a clearer shot of the parma baby as well).

Great chips. Chunky beer battered steak chips that were perfectly cooked and had the crunch that the parma was missing. They reminded me a lot of the famous Bad Boy Chips from the Mail Exchange Hotel, If only they had've been a little more seasoned they would have been on par - but we all had to reach for the salt shaker a few times. The personal sauce pot was appreciated as well.

The salad was a bit boring. It was big, and a side bowl for salad is always a plus, but when it came down to pure ingredients there wasn't much to write home about, lettuce, onion, a sliver of cucumber and drizzled with some oil, not the best.

Pacinos serves up a big meal, for $22.90 you wont leave hungry and I'd be pretty happy to pay it again for what I got. The $10 parma night is an amazing deal, and I can see why they pump out so many parmas on a Monday, However if you look at Pacinos' Pinterest page they have quite a few photos of the novelty parmas available ...

Notice something? The chips are different!

I may be wrong, but it would appear that the amazing beer battered chunky chips are absent from the Monday night special, not a big deal, but the chips were one of my favourite parts of the Pacinos parma, so it's worth noting they might not be there on a Monday.

Yet even without the chips $10 is still a great deal, I'd definitely stop in and give it a go.

**EDIT** It has come to my attention since posting this review that the Monday special at Pacinos differs not only on the chips but on other aspects of the parma as well, So I'm stating for the record that this review and score only applies to the full price parma, not the Monday night special, which we have yet to try and/or rate.

Opinions were mixed on the Pacinos parma (as you can no doubt tell from the quotes) It isn't without its problems but all in all its a decent feed that is hard to take issue with, If you find yourself in Flemington its worth checking out - it'd be the perfect spot for lunch before hitting the Royal Melbourne Show in September.

Parma - 6.18

Chips - 7.25

Salad - 4.67

Value - 6.25

Total - 6.11

The search continues...

Attempt #150 - 'Prahran Hotel'

[info]When? - 11th of July, 2013

Where? - Prahran Hotel, 82 High St. Prahran.

Price? - $21 ($13 Steak & Parma night Tuesday & Wednesday)

Website? - http://prahranhotel.com/

Reviewers – Adam, Cale, Dale, Emma, Lee, Matt, Nikki, Stefo[/info]

150 parmas! Not quite as big of a milestone as 100 parmas, but worth acknowledging none the less. Hooray for us and thanks for reading! Couldn't have gotten this far without you guys.

Now, on to the pub.

The Prahran Hotel got off to a bit of a rocky start. Ffter taking out the facebook vote in a spectacular comeback, I called on Wednesday to secure our table for Thursday night (normally I book on the day, however I knew we'd have a few people and wanted to make sure we got a table).

I called the Prahran and made a booking, While on the phone the staff member told me "Oh we can fit in the halfpipe if you'd like!". She sounded enthusiastic so I accepted, not quite sure what the "halfpipe" was. Curious, I went to google and turned up this image -

Nice! The halfpipe is just that - half of a concrete pipe, fitted out with tables and suspended above the rest of the pub. Awesome, and fitting for an event such as parma #150. I told the rest of the review team - We were pumped.

However about 3 hours later I got a phone call. It was the Prahran Hotel.

Apparently, and I'm quoting here, "Someone with a gold card called and booked the halfpipe, so we wont be able to seat you there"

We'd been bumped. I accepted a table in the dining area and the call was over - I googled "Prahran Hotel gold card" and got no results ... something very fishy going on here. I mean I didn't really care, but at the same time its never nice to be told you aren't as important as the person who wants your table.

Thursday night rolled around and we rocked up at the Prahran. Wow. This has to be one of the best renovations I've seen in my life. The back room (the one with all the pipes) is absolutely spectacular, and a must see if you're a fan of Melbourne pubs - Completed by the same pub group that did the Richmond Club Hotel (which we tried a few weeks back) These guys have a stellar pedigree of revitalising run down pubs, and the Prahran hotel is no exception.

 I haven't seen a more impressive collection of pipes since Super Mario Bros. 3

I'm going to be referencing our review of The Richmond Club Hotel a fair bit from this point on, so if you haven't read it yet you might want to familiarise yourself, as there are a lot of similarities between the two pubs.

The first thing that both bars share is the concept of the "Karma Keg" -

Such a fantastic idea, too bad I've never been to one of these pubs on a Friday.

Secondly (and a little less awesome) is the concept of seating times, both the RCH and the Prahran have set seating times for dinner - a 6pm and 8pm sitting. This really throws a spanner in the works for our reviews as we've been doing parmas at 7pm sharp for the past hundred-and-fifty weeks. We arrived at 7, pulled up a pew in the public bar at the front and killed time till we were good to take our table, a few bowls of wedges went around which served as a solid pre-game to the main event, so it turned out to be less of an inconvenience than we had originally thought, but just something to keep in mind when you're planning your night.

8pm came around and we took our (non tube-shaped) seat in the dining room, picked up our menus and spied the target...

By this time I was starving so we placed our orders. I finished what was left of my pint (about half a pint, from memory) and went to the bar for a refill - by the time I returned the parmas were on the table.

Now not everyone's parma was shaped like an inverted Africa, that was just mine - the 7 other parmas on the table kept a traditional shape.

The schnitzel was decent quality. Juicy, unprocessed and appeared to be pan fried, the crumbs were thin and unobtrusive (although nothing special in the flavour department). Thickness-wise it was a mixed bag, with some parts looking like this -

and other parts like this -

I'm not sure if it was from the schnitzel or the napoli but there was a strong citrusy zest to the dish, I've got a feeling the schnitz was given a liberal squeeze of lemon juice before the other toppings went on, and that flavour really shone through. The ham and napoli were there, but quite bland and didn't add much to the dish at all.

I hope you like a lot of cheese as this parma had an overload. So much cheese that a couple of times I cut into what I thought was parma, but came out with only toppings. Heaps of cheese, which isn't necessarily a bad thing at all - but it was as bland as the ham & nap.

The chips were stellar. Perfectly cooked, beer battered and very well seasoned, crispy on the outside and fluffy on the inside - I wanted more the moment I was done.

The salad was nothing too special, lettuce,cucumber, a tomato wedge and some slivers of onion with a creamy mustard dressing. It served it purpose but didn't do so with any particular style.

For $21 it didn't sting too badly for what we got, If I was at The Prahran again I'd consider having it again, but wouldn't go out of my way to get it. They run a $13 Tuesday & Wednesday parma night which would definitely be worth checking out, even if just to see the great renovations.

When we tried the parma at the Richmond Club Hotel our major complaint was that it was overcooked to the point of being burnt and dry - I think the Prahran parma is virtually identical when it comes to ingredients (especially in the case of the chips) but they were prepared with more care, the schnitz was succulent and juicy - no complaints in how it was cooked - Which put it ahead of the RCH in terms of score. It's not a bad parma by any means, but it lacks any flair that would make me want to recommend it to my friends, I'd say if you went on a parma night to have a look at the amazing establishment and a cheap feed you wouldn't be disappointed.

Parma - 5.38

Chips - 7.50

Salad - 5.44

Value - 6.44

Total - 6.03

The search continues...

Attempt #149 - 'Victoria Hotel'

[info]When? - 4th of July, 2013

Where? - Victoria Hotel, 380 Victoria St. Brunswick

Price? - $15 Parma n pot Thursdays, $17 other times.

Website? - http://vichotelbrunswick.com.au/

Reviewers – Cale, Dale, Lee, Nikki, Pat, Stefo[/info]

I've  said it before, but I really need to start writing down how we come across these pubs. I feel bad that the person that took the time to suggest it doesn't get credited - oh well, you know who you are buddy! Cheers!

Anyway, somehow the Victoria hotel ended up on our list, it made it to the Facebook poll and got up. In my pre-attempt research into the pub I checked out their website (I always do, to get an address  phone number and confirm that there is actually a parma on the menu)

First up, the menu...

Parma... Check! Then the specials caught my eye -

Lovely We haven't had a good parma & pot deal for a while, Most cheap parma nights in Melbourne fall on a Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday (in an effort to get people in on the quiet nights) so a Thursday cheap parma is quite rare these days. Bonus. Lock it in. Load up the parma bus.

We arrived at the Victoria to quite an unusual sight - Apparently Thursdays in addition to being Parma Night are also "Go Go Dancing Night", taught by Anna's Go-Go Academy. $10 a sesh, while we didn't partake it was fun to watch, and it seemed like everyone involved was having a good time.

As you'd expect from a pub/backpackers there is no shortage of entertainment options at the Vic - with pool, jukebox, foosball, plenty of TV's and even a ping pong table you'd have to try hard to be bored. We walked past the GoGo'ers, through the dining area in the back and out to the beer garden. Although it was a horribly cold & windy night outside the high walls and abundance of heaters meant we were perfectly comfortable, and the roaring open outdoor fire was a great touch.

 Apologies for the Instagram filter, but doesn't that look cosy!

A few review members were still to arrive and we were hungry people, so we indulged in a pregame serve of cheesy herb & garlic bread. I forgot to grab a picture but it was a decision we didn't regret - We got a full plate of turkish bread slices with an abundance of garlic & herbs, plenty of cheese and a spicy dipping sauce - for only $4 you'd be silly not to start your meal with this quality entree.

Everyone arrived, we went to the bar and ordered our parmas, as promised it came to $15 with a free pot. Just lovely.

Before too long the parmas arrived from the kitchen...

Not bad! Not bad at all... 

Expectations were pretty low for a backpackers discount parma, but I was pleasantly surprised. For processed chicken breast it was of the highest quality (best of a bad thing, I suppose) - probably the thickest processed shnitz we've ever come across. The crumbs were nothingness and there was a fair bit of nudity but that's not that big of a complaint. The cheese, the ham and the napoli all carried their flavour quite well (although a touch more nap would have been appreciated). Not a stand out dish, but it was enjoyable and nobody left hungry - definitely better than I was expecting.

Now I forgot to take a cross section until I was 3/4 of the way through the parma, so don't take the below photo as any indication of thickness, just use it to appreciate the chicken quality and ingredients layers (the crumbs were thin, no attempt to hide credit card chicken under an inch of crumbs)...

The chips were good, fresh, crispy and plenty of them hiding under the parma (I removed them from their sweaty prison immediately after we got the dish). Could've used a bit more salt but thats a minor complaint, an all round solid accompaniment, on par with the rest of the dish.

If there's one way to get us to like a salad, it's to dress it well. The salad with the Victoria parma had plenty in it (lettuce, onion, tomato, cucumber, mustard seeds, even some olives thrown in) and covered with a creamy dressing - it was very enjoyable and for a garden salad it was quite good. My one criticism would be, if you're going to put olives in a salad can you make sure they're pitted?  Nothing more annoying than having a collection of spat out olive seeds on the side of your plate while trying to enjoy a parma.

Great value here, $15 with a pot you can't expect the best meal, but the Vic turn out a quality bird for those on a budget. All of the meals on the menu are similarly priced - The garlic bread was especially good for the price (I've had worse GB at double the price).

This parma isn't going to win any awards, yet I don't think its trying to. Yes the chook is processed but for only fifteen bucks with a beverage you've got to cut them some slack - It's an honest meal for an honest price, sure it has it's faults but I'd have no problems dropping in on a Thursday night again if I were in the area. If I were paying full price ($17) I'd probably go elsewhere, but as far as a cheapo parma & pot deal goes it's one of the better ones we have come across. Victoria Hotel is definitely worth checking out if you're on a budget but craving a hit of parma and a game of ping pong (or a Go-Go dance).

Parma - 6.83

Chips - 6.42

Salad - 6.50

Value - 8.00

Total - 6.92

The search continues...

Attempt #148 - 'The Irish Times'

[info]When? - 27th of June, 2013

Where? - The Irish Times, 427 Little Collins Street. Melbourne.

Price? - $19.00

Website? - http://www.theirishtimespub.com.au/

Reviewers – Dale, Em, Lee, Matt, Stefo[/info]

The Irish Times is one of those pubs that I've known of for ages, been into very briefly a couple of times, but never really figured it as a place that does more than just a good pint of Guinness - Yet when it was suggested to us that we give their parma a go I wondered why we hadn't tried it before.

In the middle of the CBD, on Lt. Collins St. (between Queen and William) lies the Irish Times, or as I always thought of it - "The Irish pub with the massive flag out the front" - as hanging from the roof of the pub is an Irish flag that would give the Aussie flag at the *** roundabout a run for its money, size wise. I arrived a good hour before the rest of the group was due to rock up as I had neglected to book a table earlier in the day, and wanted to make sure I could secure one. Arriving at around 6pm on a Thursday I was blown away with how busy this place was ... I definitely wasn't expecting it, but it was almost shoulder to shoulder in the cosy pub, right back into the dining room. This was gonna be an issue, While formulating a plan I went to the bar and grabbed a pint. As I returned from the bar, pint in hand, like a miracle a table for 5 beside the door opened up. I swooped in before anyone else could take it and set up shop.

You know that scene in "Seinfeld" where Elaine has to hold the seats for everyone in a crowded movie theatre and has to fend off people trying to steal them?

[youtube id="xx4N8vGbs8I" width="580" height="337"]

This was my life for about 45 minutes last night, however I devised a plan, I grabbed a menu from the bar, downed my first pint and got another, then arranged the empty glass, my coat, and the menu around the table to give the illusion to anybody walking past that I was with a group of people, who were either in the dunny or at the bar at the time. Childish, I know, but worked like a charm.

Just after the group arrived the first little bonus of the night occurred - we were offered some mini spring rolls! Apparently they had free finger food circulating, I can't see a mention on the website as to why there was free finger food, It didn't seem like there was much of a special event on (and I don't think we wandered into a private function) but it was greatly appreciated none the less.

Once everyone arrived and stuffed into the cosy little corner by the window, someone suggested that we checked upstairs to see if there was any room up there. Upstairs? In my many beers at the Irish Times I'd never even registered that there was an upstairs, but sure enough there was (unbeknownst to me) a second, much roomier, level with its own bar, tables and massive screen TV. We scored a table, was (again) offered some free spring rolls and went to the bar to place our order...

We sat back down and awaited our parmas, it was much busier downstairs which gave us the ability to converse without shouting - much more conducive for dinner conversation, however the atmosphere of the Irish Times is great both downstairs and up - it feels like more of a genuine Irish Pub as opposed to some of the pretenders around that think if you paint the walls dark green, whack some farming equipment on the wall and pour a guinness on tap then you're an irish pub. It had a good feel and it'd definitely stick out in my mind the next time I feel like a pint in the city.

Before too long our parmas arrived...

First up, the schnitz - It was a little small, but made up for that in both thickness and freshness. The chicken itself was great quality, juicy and tasty - however it fell apart greatly at the crumbs. I'm not sure what they were but they were rather overcooked and just fell away from the chicken, with a massive chunk of one reviewers crumbs just detaching in one big, solid piece.

The home made napoli was extremely flavourful, it had paprika or some other spice through it that gave it a very unique flavour which I enjoyed at first -  unfortunately it was very overpowering and drowned out the flavours on the rest of the dish, the ham was there but could not be detected without specifically looking for it. The cheese was fine, could have used a bit more but (like everything else) was completely muffled by the extremely strong napoli.

The chips were crispy and well cooked however lacked any seasoning, which sent everyone at the table reaching for the salt shaker - we were supplied with a bottle of tomato sauce without requesting it, which is a nice touch. It was a decent serving, nothing to write home about but nothing to complain about specifically either.

The salad was boring. Barely dressed it consisted of a few lettuce leaves and a couple of onion slivers... That's it. It was pretty clear that the salad was just an afterthought to put something green on the plate.

Value-wise it was pretty good - we haven't had a parma under $20 for a while so clocking in at $19 it's hard to complain too much, it was a little small but the free finger food was a lovely little bonus that we haven't seen before - If it was around $4 cheaper I'd consider having this parma again - or even $19 with a free pint.

One thing I noticed while looking at the menu was this little item -

A brownie. With ice cream. Served on a sizzling hot plate?! That sounds absolutely amazing. I didn't try it at the time as brownie doesn't quite go with a parma and 4 pints, but I definitely want to revisit and give it a go, it sounds like amazing sorcery.

The parma at The Irish Times isn't particularly memorable but there's nothing that offensive about it either - it's middle of the road. They started with a great foundation of quality chicken breast but kind've fell apart from there. If they eased off a little on the spice in the napoli and did something about the flakey crumbs then it would be a great little find, but until then I'll probably stick to the great music, quality guinness and free spring rolls.

Parma - 5.80

Chips - 4.70

Salad - 3.00

Value - 6.20

Total - 5.10

The search continues...

#147 -'The Portland Hotel & James Squire Brewhouse'

When? - 20th of June, 2013

Where? - The Portland Hotel & James Squire Brewhouse. 115 - 127 Russell St. Melbourne

Price? - $24.50

Website? - http://portlandhotel.com.au/

Reviewers – Em, Lee, Matt, Nikki, Stefo, Tony

No, this isn't a double review, its just a very oddly named pub. From what I can discern the Portland Hotel & James Squire Brewhouse has two names and they just can't quite decide which one is their favourite, for example their website is portlandhotel.com.au yet their twitter is @JSBrewhouse. My best guess is that the restaurant-side of the pub is The Portland Hotel, and the more "pubby" side with sports on the big screen, pool tables & more standing room is the James Squire Brewhouse (not the first JS Brewery-in-a-pub we've come across either, although our first didn't rate too well - lets hope this one does a little better!)

Either way they share a menu, a kitchen and (most importantly) a parma.

We arrived at the pub and took our seats on the brewery side of the pub. Did I mention this pub has a working brewery inside? If you hadn't worked it out by the "brewhouse" part of the pubs name, there is a working brewery in the pub - an impressive sight and beautifully executed.

First things first though... The parmas.

We located and had a browse of the comprehensive menu - This would be a fantastic pub to bring a friend from another country to, as there are quite a few Australian game meats incorporated into dishes that you don't see too often in the Melbourne CBD (crocodile, emu & kangaroo).

But we weren't there for that! We were there for the parmas...

Now, I'm not normally one to fall for pretentious meal descriptions on menu's, but hot damn that sounds good! Parmesan encrusted crumbs? Honey roasted ham? 3 cheese glaze? Stop. Just stop. You had me at parmesan.

We placed our order and awaited our parmy goodness.

Now, Second things second... The beer.

Being a James Squire Brewery it's no surprise that there is a large selection of James Squire brews available over the bar, quite a few actually! From memory there were about 12 JS beers on tap - now how can one man sample all those beers in one night? With one of the greatest words a beer lover can hear... Tasting paddle.

Isn't it a thing of beauty? And for a pretty reasonable $15 for 6 mini beers it's the perfect way to tour the brews. It's one of life's rare pleasures to be able to sip a beer while sitting next to the still in which it was brewed.

Before too long it was parma time -

Points for presentation! This is officially the first parma I've had served on a wooden board - I had seen photos and heard rumors of this phenomenon in the past (I'm pretty sure Hoo Haa used to do it, and our friends over in SA found one recently as well) - an inventive and eye catching way to serve up a parma, that's for sure.

The schnitzel was a big'un. Definitely not the thickest schnitzel we've had (bordering on a little thin in places but not alarmingly so - nobody left hungry). The chicken was juicy, white and fresh - a quality foundation for the rest of the parma to build on. The panko crumb & parmesan cheese combination was inspired, delivering a unique, tasty crunch.

The napoli was delicious - no Dolmio canned crap here, this was fresh, chunky and in plentiful supply with a strong peppery kick that tickled the back of the throat... which is a bit of a double edged sword. I loved the spicy twang to the nap as I love pepper - however I can see that if I wasn't a pepper fan it might be a tad off-putting.

The honey smoked ham was an absolute triumph, simply bursting with flavour. Picking a bit off the parma and having it on its own reminded me of ham carved straight off the bone on christmas dinner - A fantastic addition to an already great parma.

So far this parma has been generous with all its toppings - and the cheese was no exception , this parma was cheesier than a 70's fondue party. Don't let the menu description fool you, the "3 cheese glaze" described is just your regular melted cheese - and in no way is that a bad thing. The three cheese combo carried outstanding flavour and complemented the rest of the dish perfectly.

Apologies for the dim cross-section lighting, It was a dimly lit pub, and I don't thing they would have appreciated me balancing my parma on the pool table to get good a better photo...

Despite being touted on the menu as fries there was a chunkier chip delivered on the plate - dodging a bullet in my opinion as I've always preferred a chunkier chip over a McDonald's style fry. A decent serving, and despite arriving mostly underneath the parma managed to retain their crunch (and to be brutally honest, a couple of soggy chips under the parma never really bothered me all that much - sometimes a few chips soaking up the parma juices can actually be pretty tasty!).

They were perfectly cooked and seasoned. I seem to say it every week but a pot of something to dip them in would have done wonders.

After an outstanding parma and chips the Portland's parma kind've fell over at the salad. The separate bowl was a nice touch and they weren't tight with the balsamic dressing, but there just wasn't a lot in there. A few lettuce leaves, a halved cherry tomato, two cucumber cubes and a radish slice. It wasn't bad but I just would have loved something more substantial, especially considering the high bar the other two elements of the dish set.

Our rule of thumb for judging value on a parma is "would I be happy to go back and pay what I paid again, for what I received". While the Portland's parma is a little pricey at $24.50 (not the most expensive, but not exactly cheap either) I would have absolutely no qualms in giving it another go anytime.

I absolutely loved the Portland Hotel's parma, all the ingredients were top notch and the peppery kick to the napoli was something that we don't see every week. It's an outstanding bird that I definitely recommend giving a try - if you aren't afraid of a little spice you definitely won't regret it.

Parma - 8.89

Chips - 7.97

Salad - 6.57

Value - 8.00

Total - 8.07

The search continues...

Attempt #146 - 'The Richmond Club Hotel'

[info]When? - 14th of June, 2013

Where? - The Richmond Club Hotel. 100 Swan st. Melbourne

Price? - $21

Website? - http://richmondclubhotel.com.au/

Reviewers – Fridge, Janet, Lee, Matt, Nikki, Stefo[/info]

In my drunken travels up & down Swan Street, I have walked past the Richmond Club Hotel many times, yet I've always registered it as a bit of a dive - ignorant of me, I know, but with so many attractive establishments in the area the RCH never really fell onto my radar.

How wrong I was.

A few weeks ago I was reading an article about the newly renovated Prahran Hotel (which looks amazing, by the way) and it was mentioned that one of the owners previous projects was the Richmond Club Hotel. I did some googling and good lord, behind the shoddy exterior the RCH is a simply gorgeous pub.

pic nicked from the RCH website-

I had to check it out in person so we put it on last weeks facebook poll, it got up with ease (always a sign of a good pub) and last night we headed over.

As expected, behind the unassuming facade the inside of the Richmond Club Hotel is a sight to behold - three levels of booths, couches, cosy nooks to get comfy in, and more bars than you can shake a stick at (mostly because you'd probably get kicked out if you started waving around a stick in a busy pub, thats just irresponsible. You could have someone's eye out).

The Dining room is on the ground floor (along with the public bar), but the RCH dining room has two set seating times for dinner - the first at 5:45, the second at 8 and seeing as we rocked up at seven we were kind've in the middle of both. So rather than hit the dining room we headed up a level and found a booth up there, this floor has more of a "clubby" sort of vibe, with dance floor, DJ booth and so on. The pub was filling up and we were lucky to snag the table that we did. If it weren't such a horrible winter's night we would have ventured up even further to the rooftop beer garden, which has to be one of the best rooftop pubs I have ever seen, with massive 20 person booths and a view of the Melbourne skyline that has to be seen to be believed.

We took our seats, checked the bar menu, spied our target...

and placed our order.

Cheap drinks were in effect from 6 till 7, so we came in just early enough to snag one $6 pint before they went back to regular prices, a nice little bonus. On Friday's the pub runs a "Karma Keg" (commonplace among this pub group) wherein for one keg you can pay whatever you like for a pot - with all proceeds going to charity/local projects. A great idea, and I applaud them for it.

After about 10 minutes the first two (of six) parmas arrived, Unfortunately the rest of them didn't come out for another ten to fifteen minutes on top of that, Which was a bit of an annoyance. Either way, we tucked in...

If you're gonna serve a parma that's relatively small, you should reduce the size of your plate - it looks lonely.

The schnitzel was quite small, but made from real chicken breast and thick enough, without cheating with the crumbs. Unfortunately the bird itself was rather dry, all of our parmas were rather overcooked - some verging on burnt (there were some black edges around the table).

The cheese, napoli and ham were all present, but all rather flavourless - there was no spice in the napoli and both the cheese & ham were very bland, which sent most of the table reaching for the salt & pepper to spice it up.

This is one of the smallest parma descriptions I've done, but I really have nothing else to say - purely because the parma is a lot of nothingness - no part of it was particularly objectionable (other than the dryness of the chicken) but it was just a non-event

Unlike the parma, the chips were outstanding. Piping hot, beer battered and delicious (although with so much room on the plate it would have been easy to not lay the parma on top). They were well seasoned, crispy on the outside and fluffy on the inside. If they had've supplied some sort of dipping sauce (like garlic aioli - even a bit of the old dead horse) they'd be heading for a perfect score.

The salad was another disappointment, a pile of lettuce (albeit fresh) with a couple of carrot and onion shavings and single hunk of tomato. Taking a page from the parma's book, it was a bit bland and lifeless.

$21 is a bit steep for what was delivered seeing as we all left a little hungry, but  the cheap pints helped ease the sting a little. The RCH runs a $13 parma night on Tuesday & Wednesday, yet I've heard (unconfirmed) reports from quite a few people that the real chicken breast is switched out for a processed cheapo schnitzel on the discount days - A major party foul if true (foul. Get it? Because its a chicken?... Anyone?).

The full priced version wasn't terrible, however I wouldn't go out of my way to have this one again.

The pub is amazing, the chips even better, yet everything else was uninspired. The menu boasts a bowl of beer battered chips with aioli, If I ever find myself at the Richmond Club again I'll definitely be getting one of those along with a pint on the rooftop beer garden, watching the trains go by and soaking in one of the best views of our great city I've seen.

Parma - 4.83

Chips - 7.92

Salad - 4.00

Value - 5.33

Total - 5.38

The search continues...

Attempt #145 - 'Hofbräuhaus'

[info]When? - 30th of May, 2013

Where? - Hofbräuhaus, 18-28 Market Ln, Melbourne.

Price? - $29.50 for the "Swiss" hähnchenschnitzel

Website? - http://www.hofbrauhaus.com.au/

Reviewers – Fridge, Lee, Stefo, Tony[/info]

Hofbräuhaus is a weird one. I'd heard about it many times, and it sounded like an awesome pub, yet for some reason the idea of doing a parma never crossed my mind. It had been suggested that we give it a go quite a few times, however I always dismissed it, as I was pretty sure that (being a traditional German pub) they wouldn't go near the idea of a "parma" and stick to strictly schnitzels (ten points if you can say "stick to strictly schnitzels" five times fast).

After the 23rd time it had been recommended to me it was time to check it out, I logged on to the website and took a gander at their online menu. Schnitzels? Check. Parmas?...kinda.

The "Swiss" schnitzel caught my eye. topped with ham, tomato and cheese? Sounds like a parma to me! It was decided. We loaded up the parma bus and headed to Hofbräuhaus

There's a few options when going to Hofbräu, there's the downstairs restaurant, the downstairs pub or the upstairs beer hall. I asked the staff what they would recommend - All areas have the same menu however the beer hall upstairs has live music - sold.

We arrived at the beer hall and took our seats, when they say that Hofbräuhaus is "a little piece of Bavaria in the heart of Melbourne" they are right on the money. Everything is perfect, from the live band playing traditional bouncy German music. to the waitresses all dressed in Bavarian bar maid outfits.

We took our seats, ordered our parmas, then tackled the beer list.

Beers at Hofbräuhaus come in 3 sizes. 250ml, 500ml and 1 Litre. Any pub that sells beer by the litre is a winner in my book. The menus (both for food and drink) are quite daunting, as the names for everything written in German. Rather than try and pronounce "HB Dunkel Weizen" I opted for the much easier "point to the menu and I'll have that one" method, which worked fine.

Before too long our schnitzels arrived (I'm trying to refrain from calling it a parma as, strictly speaking, its a "Swiss hähnchenschnitzel"

Well this was unexpected! It seems when the menu at Hofbräu claims that their Swiss schnitzel comes with "tomato" they mean it literally!

Rather than traditional napoli, Hofbräuhaus has gone with layering the schnitzel with slices of fresh tomato. I knew from the get-go that this wasn't going to be your average parma, so we picked up our cutlery and dug in.

If there's one thing the germans know how to do, its schnitzel. The bird underneath the toppings was stellar. Not to thin but not too thick while still maintaining a healthy size, Oven baked, freshly crumbed marinated chicken breast - it tasted fresh, as if it had only been crumbed minutes before. This is definitely a pub that prides itself in the quality of its schnitzels, and it shows - could easily stand on its own without the toppings at all as an amazing dish.

Hard to tell from the above photo, but there was a heap of ham on this parma, mutliple layers of shaved smoked leg ham added a delicious smokey flavour to the dish. As with the ham the cheese was also not in short supply - in fact all the toppings were applied liberally, and the slightly different taste that swiss cheese put through the dish made this a surprisingly different tasting dish.

Now, the tomato. Normally I am not a raw tomato fan. When its in a salad I steer clear, however on top of the Schnitzel and layered under the cheese it was definitely hard to avoid this time around so when I tucked into my meal ... I actually enjoyed it. The fresh tomato adds a much more subtle flavour to the dish, avoiding the punch that some napoli sauces carry - I said it earlier, but the sliced tomato added to the fresh vibe this parma gave off. I did miss a bit of garlic and some of the other spices that napoli provides, but had to keep in mind that this is not your traditional chicken parma, its a traditional German/Swiss hähnchenschnitzel.

ParmaCam 2.0! A little shaky this week as its the first ParmaCam in months. But stick with it! it'll only get better from here

[youtube id="xL0whb8Rwwc" width="580" height="337"]

Hiding under the parma (and from the lens of my camera) was a decent serving of chips, Once I freed them from they Schnitzy-prison they served as a great accompaniment to the dish and were well cooked and seasoned - however what brings these chips up from "pretty good" to "outstanding" is the pot of garlic and herb mayo provided with all the hähnchenschnitzels - I used a bit of it with the schnitzel itself, but the majority of the mayo served as chip dip - and an amazing chip dip it was! Perfectly balanced with the garlic and herbs, it was a great addition to the plate.

The garden salad didn't look impressive on the plate, and I wasn't really looking forward to it - yet on tucking in I was pleasantly surprised. It had plenty of balsamic dressing and (like everything else on the plate) tasted as fresh as if it were just plucked from the garden.

Now the bit that will probably turn a few of you away from Hofbräuhaus, the price. Clocking in at $29.50 the Schnitzel at Hofbräu is the most expensive we have reviewed to date. Don't get me wrong, it was great... Nobody walked away from the table hungry and I'd definitely have it again, however I wont lie - shelling out almost $30 for a parma did sting a little.

Hofbräuhaus is an experience you should try. Plain and simple. If you like great beer served in mammoth quantities, great food and an amazing atmosphere that you won't find anywhere else in Melbourne, then Hofbräu is the place to be. Just be aware that when you go for dinner that you aren't going for a parma, You're going for a traditional German schnitzel - if you keep an open mind and like trying something a bit different, then you'll definitely have a good time.

Parma - 7.36

Chips - 7.39

Salad - 6.72

Value - 5.95

Total - 6.96

The search continues...

Attempt #144 - 'The Sporting Globe - Moonee Ponds'

When? - 30th of May, 2013

Where? - The Sporting Globe, 690-694 Mt. Alexander Road, Moonee Ponds

Price? - $18.90 regular, $19.90 buffalo parma

Website? - http://www.sportingglobe.com.au/

Reviewers – Cale, Fridge, Janet, Lee, Nikki, Shanan, Stefo

UPDATE 13/08/15 - While not strictly a redo, we visited the Watergardens Sporting Globe on the 12th of August, 2015. This new review is most likely a more accurate representation of what the Sporting Globe now has to offer, as there have been some changes in the 2.5 years since this attempt. Check it out here.

UPDATE 07/04/16 - As an addendum to both this review and our second review at the Watergardens Globe, we investigated the new addition to the Sporting Globe's lineup - the Smoked Cheddar parma! Check it out here.

UPDATE 05/09/19 - We revisited the Globe to see what was new. Check it out here!

A long time ago I heard whispers of a new sports bar opening in Moonee Ponds, It piqued my interest and from then on I followed the development of The Sporting Globe very closely - The more I followed it, the more I liked it. An American style sports bar serving good quality bar food, good beer and a plethora of sports to watch - all a 2 minute tram ride from my front door. It was a long wait, but last week The Sporting Globe finally opened - and it was everything I was hoping for...

click to enlarge

I snapped the above panorama on the opening day last Saturday, as you can see, there is no shortage of TV's at the Globe, with over 40 screens its really hard to find a direction to look in and not see a TV.

I refrained from trying the parma on opening day, I knew I wanted to save it for an official review. So I put the vote up on the facebook and hoped against hope that it would win...

One vote! Holy crap that was close. I really wanted to like this parma, and I sound biased already, but trust me - I will be as honest as I can with this review. Putting all predispositions aside we loaded up the Parma Bus and headed to The Sporting Globe.

If there's one thing the Globe is focussing on its food specials, Each night runs a different deal with Wednesday being $13.90 parma night (unfortunately we were in on Thursday, but no matter)

The beer range is pretty standard, not much in the way of craft beers but I think that 's pretty much to be expected at a sports bar. Plenty of options on tap alongside a lengthy cocktail list and fully stocked fridge full of stubbies.

After a couple of beers in the front bar we wandered down the back steps and took our seats in the bistro, as you can see from the photo below each booth is fitted with its own personal TV screen, complete with control panel so you can select what you want to watch/what volume you want to watch it at. A fantastic touch.

We settled on "Whose Line Is It Anyway" and got stuck into the menus...

There is a lot to try on the Globe's menu, with items ranging from bar snacks (chicken wings, wedges, nachos, calamari) to more substantial fare (steaks, wraps, pizzas, burgers and ... parmas)

There are a couple of options for parma on the menu -

I was torn, I love a spicy kick to my parma, yet its a risk to take a novelty parma without first testing the standard as a baseline. We decided amongst the table that it would work if we split the order, some people got regular, others got Buffalo, and then we could all have a try of both to get a feel of them.

We placed our orders, along with a pregame of a couple of bowls of "Boneless Buffalo Bites" - Crispy boneless chicken bites coated with buffalo sauce and served with blue cheese sauce for dipping. A few were gone before I could snap the photo (they went quick!)

These little bites were fantastic, The buffalo sauce definitely carried a spicy kick but was well balanced by the blue cheese sauce. I was a little worried about having a whole parma of buffalo sauce, as the bites alone were pretty intense, and without the blue cheese sauce... it was gonna be interesting.

After a short wait our meals arrived from the kitchen...

click to enlarge

I started with the Buffalo parma, opting to have a few bites of the regular parma once finished. First off, it was damn cheesy, and as you can see by the above photo, if it had've been left any longer we would have had a dire slippery cheese situation on our hands (it had already started to slide off and pool at the base)

This is a parma of excess... Plenty of cheese, heaps of ham and lots and lots of buffalo sauce.

The buffalo sauce definitely gave the parma a kick, but damn was it overpowering. The first few bites were heaven yet towards the end I realised the only thing I could actually taste at all was buffalo sauce. The cheese, the ham, the chicken ... all buffalo flavoured.

Not to say it was bad, it was a great change up for parma lovers who want to try something different! It's an intense flavour with one hell of a kick, that works beautifully on something small like the boneless bites we had for pregame, but (as suspected) its just a bit too much when blown out to full on parma size - If they had something on the plate to level it out a little bit  *cough* blue cheese sauce *cough*  It'd be a much more enjoyable meal for the long haul.

Now, the regular parma. After finishing my buffalo parma I tried a few forkfulls of the regular (or "MVP") parma, and it was definitely a breath of fresh air after the intensity of the buffalo sauce. I could taste the ham, I could taste the cheese, I could taste the napoli and the chicken! It was all quality and great to calm down the tastebuds after the first one.

But an interesting paradox occurred when talking to the other reviewers... Those that started with the buffalo parma said the same as me - It was good but overpowering towards the end, and the bit of regular parma was a nice change.

However those that started with the regular parma said just the opposite - that it was good at first but got a bit boring towards the end, and their few bites of the buffalo parma gave them the kick that they were looking for.

It was two ends of the spectrum with no middleground for compromise! Maybe a regular parma with a pot of buffalo sauce on the side would be the way to go, but who knows.

The constant among the two parmas was the chicken schnitzel itself. Size-wise they were pretty standard - not small but not massive either - which I was thankful for after finishing my buffalo parma I was quite full, before having to tackle some of the regular.

It was real chicken breast and quite thick without being over-crumbed. While being a little dry in places it was an overall quality bird. The crumbing didn't quite hold on to the parma, however, and the bottom layer tended to flake away rather than stay on the chicken (I cropped the below cross section taller than usual so you can see this in action)

wow... that was a long chicken discussion. On to the chips!

They gave us steak knives too, I LOVE a good quality steak knife with my parma

The chips were fantastic. Well cooked, very well seasoned with (what I detected as) chicken salt. My only complaint being there just wasn't enough of them on the plate. I wanted more.

The salad was served in a bowl to the side, which was a nice touch. A standard garden salad of Lettuce, carrot, cucumber and onion (lots of onion) with a creamy dressing. Not terrible but at the same time not worth calling home about.

It's a sad state of affairs these days when I consider any parma to be under $20 as "cheap", but thats the way of the world these days. The MVP parma chimes in at $18.90 and the Buffalo parma at $19.90, both very reasonable for what you get. The night we tried the parma the drink special was $14.90 carlton draught or Midori jugs, which is very hard to sneeze at. Wednesday $13.90 parma night is definitely worth checking out, however I don't know if that applies to the Buffalo parma or just the standard.

It seems that if we judged both parmas on just the first half of the schnitzel then the globe would be getting stellar scores, yet the pair of them both have issues once you pass the halfway point - The MVP getting kinda boring and the Buffalo being just too damn rich, don't let this discourage you though - I would definitely (and most likely will) have this parma again - The Buffalo especially is a great change of pace for someone wanting to try something a bit different and don't mind a bit of spice, it's a unique parma experience that will definitely stick with me.

The venue itself is just what the area needs and will definitely be a breath of fresh air that I'm predicting will do very well indeed, absolutely worth checking out.

Parma - 6.71

Chips - 7.00

Salad - 5.57

Value - 6.43

Total - 6.49

The search continues...

Attempt #143 - 'The Hawthorn Hotel'

[info]When? - 23rd of May, 2013

Where? - The Hawthorn Hotel, 481 Burwood Rd. Hawthorn

Price? - $21 regular, $22.5 mexican

Website? - http://thehawthorn.com/

Reviewers – Fridge, Lee, Matt, Nikki, Stefo, Tony[/info]

When the poll went up last week I was not expecting such emphatic support for The Hawthorn. It started slow, with a few votes here and there, then out of nowhere there was a wave of fans, not only casting their vote, but pleading in the comments below that we give it a try. Who were we to say no?

That's dedication - this pub has a fanbase

I hadn't been to The Hawthorn in years, the last time being when "23Past" (the cover band that played at The Prince of Wales) got a gig playing at The Hawthorn as well and we went to check it out. The POW burnt down over three years ago now, and it was long before that that I ventured to the Hawthorn. Long story short - it was ages ago.

Being literally across the road from Swinburne, the Hawthorn is most definitely a uni pub, and a staple of the uni pub is the cheap meal deal - which The Hawthorn is not in short supply of. "Parmageddon" falls on Monday night, and comes with a choice of 10 alter-egos and trivia for $13 - not a bad deal. The night we were there (Thursday) was "International Burger Night". I didn't see a menu, so I can't be sure what exactly makes the burgers "International", but tantalising none the less.

There were tables for dining scattered all over the dance floor and around the corner, as well as some comfy couches by the doors. We had a table booked but moments after arriving the acoustic band on stage fired up, now I don't mind a bit of background music while I eat and nothing against the band itself, but the music was just too damn loud - It was Friday-night-11pm loud, which is acceptable for Friday nights at 11pm, but not for 7pm on a Thursday when everyone in your bar is trying to eat, It was to the point where we had to shout our orders for drinks and food over the bar and opted to sit outside in the inside/outside courtyard instead of on the dance floor

I sound like a cranky old man in that last paragraph. Get off my lawn!

As you can see, there is a choice for either Mexican or Regular parma, both looked equally delicious however everyone at the table opted for some standard parmas, we placed the order and waited for the birds to arrive, but not before a bit of communal pregame -

Bruschetta

Wedges with sweet chilli & sour cream

Pregame was quality, however totally unnecessary as once the parmas arrived we were already filling up. Eyes definitely bigger than our stomachs

Didn't take too long for the parmas to start filing out of the kitchen, between a quarter and a half of a pint drinking time.

Click the pic to enlarge

First impressions - Impressive.

Massive, juicy schnitzel with beautifully crunchy crumbs that would have been a fine dish without the toppings, Perfect schnitzel thickness  and cooked to perfection.

The toppings were a bit of a mixed bag. First up, the cheese. There was a lot of cheese, which isn't necessarily a bad thing however this was all mozzarella, which has a tendency to be a bit bland when its the only thing you're eating, a multiple cheese blend would do this parma wonders.

The Napoli. Again, there was a lot of it, it was fresh and flavoursome - but funnily enough it was rarely in the same place as the cheese, one bite you would get all napoli, the next all cheese. The bits where they were in balance were great, but more often than not it was all or nothing.

The ham was there, but it didn't bring much to the party, When I have to check to see if there is ham on the parma it isn't a great sign, but points for having it at least.

I'm being critical. all up the elements came together to form a damn fine parma, with a few tweaks it could be outstanding, but as it stands it's still one I'd be happy to return for.

The chips were, in a word, Amazeballs (okay, that isn't a word technically but it definitely is an accurate description of these chips) Beer battered chips that were somewhere between fries and chunky chips, cooked to perfection - crunchy outside and soft inside. I was worried when we sat in the courtyard that there was no salt on the table, was relieved to find it wasn't needed in the slightest, perfectly seasoned

It's not often I feel the chips warrant their own photo, but this week definitely. The star of the dish -

Now when the parmas arrived, Reviewer Nikki pulled a chip out of her pile and let out an audible "Woah!" I looked over to see her holding up the biggest chip I have ever seen.

We saved it till last and kept it to the side, get a load of this monster (laying across the center of a full sized dinner plate)-

How big was the potato that this chip was birthed from?

The salad was average, Garden salad of lettuce, cucumber, tomato onion and grilled capsicum with some cream dressing. It wasn't particularly objectionable and the grilled capsicum was a nice touch, but nothing fantastic.

For $21 I was happy with what I got, if you check in when you arrive at The Hawthorn on a Thursday you get a free pot, which is a nice little touch and definitely appealing to the student crowd. If the parma maintains the same quality as it does tonight as it does on their Tuesday & Saturday "$13 pot and parma nights" then I would say it's one of the best value parma n' pot deals we have found so far.

After the pregaming and the sizable parma we struggled to clear our plates. The entrees definitely weren't necessary as The Hawthorn offers up a parma that it would be hard to walk away from hungry. It was a great parma in a pretty good location (the raised beer garden would be perfect for a summer parma in the sun) - A student's dream, definitely one worth checking out.

Parma - 7.50

Chips - 8.67

Salad - 5.25

Value - 7.25

Total - 7.23

The search continues...

Attempt #142 - 'The Woodlands Hotel'

When? - 17th of May, 2013

Where? - The Woodlands Hotel, 84 - 88 Sydney Rd, Coburg.

Price? - $25

Website? - http://www.thewoodlandshotel.com.au/

Reviewers – Adam, Lee, Nikki, Stefo

UPDATE 02/08/18 - After launching a new menu we returned to the Woodlands. Click here for the updated review!

“If you go down to the woods today, you’re sure of a big surprise”

A quote directly from The first page of Woodlands Hotel’s website. I like suprises, and these days when it comes to parmas a surprise is a difficult feat to pull off.

After an overwhelming win on the facebook poll, we loaded up the parma bus and headed to Coburg.

The Woodlands is a cosy pub with a funky flair, overflowing with personality and style. We stuck to the downstairs bar, but the upstairs dining room and courtyard out the back both looked promising.

Deciding on a beer is quite the feat, with over 50 different beers on the  beer menu there are certainly enough options to warrant multiple visits

We took our seats and grabbed the menu, Target acquired…

We placed our orders at the bar and waited, I forgot to set the stopwatch this week so I can’t say exactly how long it took for the parmas to arrive, but it wasn’t long at all - Half a pint. Max.

A tip of the hat to The Woodlands Hotel - I was definitely surprised…

This was certainly a different parma, with a very unique presentation style.

I will say that although it looks amazing, serving everything in a pile such as it was was a bit of the pain in the ass to eat, especially with the amount of chips that there were and the curved plate (almost a bowl) the meal was served in, it took a fair amount of jiggering to get the parma down from fries mountain.

The schnitzel was thick, juicy and carried a flavour that made us forgiving of the nudity. However the schnitz was definitely not the most interesting part of this parma - it’s time to talk toppings.

This was not your ordinary parma, it was a re-imagining. Now just because it’s a new take doesn’t make it bad, quite the opposite - Much like the Star Trek movies compared to the original series, this parma had a lot to offer. (**Edit - I’m not saying the original series was bad. I mean that both the original and the remake, while both being good, have different things to offer)

First of all we had prosciutto instead of straight ham, a risky choice as prosciutto can often make a parma taste insanely salty - not in this case. It was a bold flavour that worked well with the other unique ingredients

Secondly, the cheese. Rather than going for shredded cheese coverage, The Woodlands opted for layering the parma with slices of taleggio cheese (A soft rind cheese, like camembert or brie), as you can see from the above photo it was fresh, with mine still having some of the rind attached. This was another brave choice that would not have worked with many other parmas, yet with this parma the flavours complimented each other beautifully.

There was plenty of chunky, fresh homemade napoli, also full of very strong flavours, I detected a lot of red wine but I can’t be sure.

Now, In the last few paragraphs I have used a lot of adjectives like “bold”, “strong” and “adventurous” to describe the toppings, and they all work beautifully together, however my one criticism for this parm would be that its just so much. 

There is so much going on in this parma its a bit of an overload, It’s just so rich that I had to stop halfway through and take a breather, snack on some chips, then continue. It’s a very heavy dish, you definitely won’t be walking away hungry.

I mentioned it earlier, but under the parma there definitely wasn’t a shortage of fries. A mountain of wonderfully cooked shoestring fries (aka. Maccas chips) waited under the parmage. I’m not a big fan of fries over chunky chips, yet these did the job fine and were a great palate cleanser when the parma got to be too much.

The garden salad (lettuce & onion, tossed in oil) was served on top of the parma. My first instinct was to push it to the side and finish it later, which I did, and found it to be a little bland. However talking to the lads afterwards it appears I made an error as their tactic was to leave the salad atop the parma and eat them both together, parma and salad at the same time. It seemed like a popular move and if I had the parma again I’d definitely give this method of consumption a try.

The Woodlands definitely put top quality ingredients into their parma (taleggio cheese and prosciutto especially) so its hard to complain about a $25 price tag. Yeah its a bit expensive but for a gourmet parma such as this it’s to be expected, I’d happily pay it again.

This isn’t a parma for everyone. It has a lot of bold flavours and brave choices. However if you’re adventurous and in the mood for something a bit different, then definitely give it a try.

You might be surprised.

Parma - 7.75

Chips -  6.00

Salad - 6.00

Value - 6.75

Total - 6.85

The search continues…

Attempt #141 - 'The Duke'

 

[info]When? - 9th of May, 2013

Where? - The Duke, 146 Flinders st. Melbourne

Price? - $22.50

Website? - http://dukeofwellington.com.au/

Reviewers – Cale, Lee, Matt, Nikki, Tony, Stefo[/info]

Like a baby fresh from the womb, The Duke is brand spanking new on the Melbourne city pub scene. After a complete re-do The Duke reopened its doors on the 28th of March this year (only a month and a bit ago), and I can tell you now - they did a great job.

Before we get to the parmas, lets talk about the pub. In a word - Fantastic. An absolutely expert refit had breathed new life into this Melbourne pub - It’s funky, it’s modern yet it retains a classic feel. On the Thursday night that we visited the place was buzzing with suits who dropped in for an after work drink. Great atmosphere in the front bar, and some great looking meals coming out around the back.

I’ll be honest, I was excited. My pre-parma-beer was pulled with skill and served ice cold. However we have been fooled in the past, A good pub doesn’t always mean good parma (and its always bitterly disappointing when that is the case).

We grabbed some menus and took a seat…

Parma confirmed. Although it is worth noting that the rest of the menu at The Duke looks phenomenal - it’s not often you find a pub that serves a breakfast menu from 7am and toasted vegemite & gruyere sandwiches from 11pm until close. Do yourself a favour and check out the rest of the menu here.

We placed our order. a few moments later we were delivered the little caddy pictured below -

Cutlery, salt, pepper, tomato sauce, HP Sauce and two varieties of hot sauce (green and red). A lovely touch and greatly appreciated.

Rather than the usual schtick of counting the amount of pints between ordering the food and it arriving, we opted for a more accurate measure this week -

15 minutes - pretty good for five parmas! That’s 3 minutes a parma…

They landed on the table in front of us and we dug in without hesitation. There was some variation of shape around the table, which is a sign of real, hand crumbed chicken breast…

This was a good parma, As suspected the chicken breast was hand-pounded, a little thin for my tastes but a minor complaint. The breast was big, juicy, tasty and served piping hot.

The crumbing was fantastic. not too thick and around the edges they carried the perfect crunch. I could easily have the schnitzel on its own (without the toppings) and be happy with this meal.

Speaking of the toppings. They were basic, yet expertly executed. The napoli was plentiful, The cheese was the perfect combination of melty and golden brown and the the gypsy ham was detectable & added a lovely flavour.

There really isn’t much to criticise about this parma! On some of the rounder parmas at the table (they ranged in shape from big and round to long and skinny) the few bites at the center were a bit soggy, not nearly as crispy and delicious as the edges. But I’m nitpicking here.

The hand cut chips were also top notch. served beside the parma (thank god) they were chunky, hot and fluffy in the center. You know you’ve got a good chip when the only complaint I can think of is that I just wanted more. There weren’t many chips on the plate and the amount of chips also varied around the table, some people counting as few as eight chips (I was a bit luckier in getting 14 or 15). However, they were delicious.

The garden salad on the side was just that, a basic garden salad. However on the spectrum of garden salads, this was a good one … Mostly because it had a heap of both dressing an onion on it - two things I love in a salad, along with cucumber slices and cherry tomatoes. For a garden salad, it was good - I can’t help but wish there was a bit of variety on the plate

$22.50 for the parma we ate was a very fair price. I’d be back any day of the week and happily pay that again.

The pub is an ongoing project, With reports that they are opening a second and third level in “stage 2” later this year, definitely worth keeping an eye on.

The Duke is a must-try. Simple as that. I’ve been watching a lot of “My Kitchen Rules” lately and there is one thing they always say - If you’re going to do something simple, you’ve got to pull it off perfectly. That is the Duke’s parma in a nutshell. There aren’t any bells and whistles or fancy gimmicks, it’s your basic parma, chips and salad … yet it is a truly superb basic parma chips and salad.Give it a try.

Parma - 8.60

Chips - 8.10

Salad - 7.50

Value - 7.60

Total - 8.08

The search continues…

Attempt #140 - 'The Plough Hotel'

Shoutout to blog Foodscrazy for the photo - I hope you don’t mind that I nicked it! couldn’t find a better post-renovation pic.

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When? - 3rd of May, 2013

Where? - The Plough Hotel, 333 Barkly St. Footscray

Price? - $25

Website? - http://www.ploughhotel.com.au/

Reviewers – Cale, Fridge, Janet, Lee, Matt, Michael, Nikki, Stefo[/info]

Footscray is an area we have somewhat neglected. Not sure why. I don’t think its due to lack of options, however it just doesn’t seem to get suggested to us all that often. Don’t get me wrong - I have been pestering The Station via twitter to put a parma on their menu since I first tried their amazing menu… but to no avail.

So when I heard the long-neglected Plough had recently had a revamp it was on the top of my list. It won the vote by a clear margin, and last night we loaded up the parma bus, passed the famed “Footscrayzy” sign and headed to The Plough Hotel.

Arriving at The Plough the first thing that struck me was the renovations, the place looks absolutely gorgeous. Polished wood floors, minimalist design, an all round class act and expertly executed revamp breathing new life into the old girl. If I had one complaint is that the new design is all tables, there isn’t really a spot where you can stand around and chat or lean against the bar, as the place has a much more restaurant-y vibe than that of a pub.

We took our seats in one of the oversized booths and perused the menu

The urge to pre-game and get some entree’s were strong, as the menu is mighty tantalising, however we stayed the course and went with just the parma - it’s been a long slump of mediocrity lately, and we needed to focus our stomachs 100% on the task at hand.

We placed our orders and anxiously awaited the arrival of our food. By the time we had ordered our meals the place was packed, so it was a slightly longer wait than I was hoping for (the majority of a pint went down while waiting) but that’s understandable for such a busy place.

Took a trip to the bar to get a fresh pint of Steam Ale and returned to find the parmas had been delivered (don’t you just love when that happens?)

Things looked good, We picked up our cutlery and tucked in…

The chicken quality was phenomenal, thick, perfectly cooked and so juicy. The crumbing was paper thin but rather soggy. The gypsy ham added a (subtle) but great flavour to the dish and the cheese was perfectly melted with just the right amount of browning. But the absolute star of the parma was the chunky tomato salsa.

Now, when the Plough says “chunky” they sure mean “chunky” with hunks of melt-in-your-mouth roast tomato and make-your-breath-stink-for-hours (but in a good way) onion. The chunky salsa gave the dish such a rustic feel and really brought the dish to life. Delish.

I loves me some beer battered chips, and these were pretty damn good. .. With a couple of exceptions;

Firstly, they were under the parma. Now this is the most common complaint about chips in the world of parmas and I usually try not to mention it, as after 140 parmas its just something you come to terms with - However this parma was served on quite a large plate, with a heap of extra space. They could have very easily fit the chips, salad and parma on the plate without leaving half of my beer battered beauties a soggy mess.

Secondly, after a few chips it became quite obvious that they were fried in the same oil that they use to cook the fish & chips, as they had a quite sublte yet quite distinct fishy taste too them that, once noticed, was pretty distracting.

A lot of complaints for what were essentially a delicious serve of chips I know, but it had to be mentioned.

The salad. It’s no secret to regular readers of Parma Daze that I hate rocket salad… (If I wanted to eat grass I’d go and chew on the nature strip) and unfortunately this salad was all rocket. 

There were some interesting ingredients, in addition to a few slivers of capsicum and radish we discovered what appeared pomegranate seeds - an inspired choice for a salad. I just wish wish wish they hadn’t used rocket, The bitterness of that devil weed just killed it for me.

$25 is pretty pricey for a parma, however when you’re using ingredients of this quality it is to be expected. I’d be happy to pay that again, purely for the parma itself, and I’ll definitely be back to The Plough to give the rest of the menu a try.

All in all this was an outstanding parma, some damn good chips and a disappointing salad. Definitely give it a go, if only for the amazing chunky salsa and top notch bird.

Parma - 8.13

Chips - 7.31

Salad - 5.50

Value - 5.94

Total - 7.00

The search continues…

Attempt #139 - 'Lite n Easy Chicken Parmigiana'

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When? - 13th of April, 2013

Where? - The comfort of my own couch.

Price? - $10-ish. A delivery of ten dinners comes to around $100

Website? - http://www.liteneasy.com.au/

Reviewers – Lee[/info]

Something a bit different this week! Our usual parma night is Thursday night, and as ANZAC day fell on the same day I was far too busy imbibing pints to break for a parma, plus getting up at 4am to make the dawn service meant I was in bed by about 7pm. So here is a review I’ve had in the bank for a couple of weeks! Hope you all had a great ANZAC day and to the people who took a sickie today to get a four day weekend, I hate you a little bit.

We shall return to normality next week, until then … Enjoy!

If you haven’t noticed lately, healthy-food-delivery-company Lite N’ Easy have been on a marketing blitz lately, You can’t turn on the TV without hearing about Brisbane Mum Natasha talking about how she has lost 15 kilos in fourteen weeks on the Lite N’ Easy diet.

Wouldn’t you know it, the marketing worked - I signed up a few weeks ago.

Going through the menu for the first delivery I noticed the Chicken Parma. Surely it’s going to be awful. Surely. But curiosity got the best of me and I placed the order. The following week I received my eski of frozen meals and the parma went into the freezer, A couple of days later it was time - I peeled back the lid the recommended 3 centimetres and chucked it in the microwave for 8 minutes.

Now the last (and only) microwaved parma we tried was the McCain’s version, which you can read about here. The difference being when we tried that one, it was Australia Day … For the Lite N’ Easy version I was stone cold sober - So I didn’t think my taste buds would be as forgiving.

The 8 minutes was up, I retrieved the cardboard box, held my breath, and peeled back the lid.

Hmm.

Doesn’t quite look like the photo from the Lite N’ Easy Website. A lot less ‘chips’ for one thing.

But I tucked in. Not really being able to see where the parma ended and the salad/potatoes started, I resolved to eat the sides first, leaving the parma till last. But I’ll get to the sides later. First - The parma…

It was a little small, but for a portion controlled ‘diet’ meal that is to be expected I suppose. I cut into the chicken expecting a thin, grey, soggy excuse for a schnitzel, but you know what? I was actually pleasantly surprised

It was white meat! and thick! we have had thinner parmas at some pubs. The crumbs were as soggy as you would expect for a parma that had spent 8 minutes in the microwave, but they weren’t too thick. The toppings lacked a lot of flavour, the cheese was barely there however they made the very odd (and unadvertised) choice of putting a layer of béchamel sauce (white sauce) under the slice of ham. It kind of tasted like they had tried to build a lasagne on top of the parma, making a parma/lasagne hybrid. Parmagne™. 

There was a slice of ham, but it was napkin thin and carried no flavour, the majority of the flavour in the dish came from the duo of sauces on top.

The chips (aka the two chunks of potato) and the salad (cubed carrot, beans, corn and some cauliflower) were pretty much what you’d expect. Steamed veggies, sure they were okay, but nothing beats some proper pub chips - but to be fair that would completely negate the ‘healthy’ aspect of the dish. Why does everything Lite N’ Easy produce have to be microwaved? Surely they could produce some fantastic and healthy oven-only dishes that didn’t mean everything you ate had the arse steamed out of it.

In the end I wasn’t nearly as offended as I expected to be. The chicken breast, although small, was actually real chicken breast and I would be happy to get it again.

Don’t get me wrong, it doesn’t even compare to a good parma from the pub, however it’s much better than it’s McCain counterpart and it’s good to know that if you’re trying to eat healthy and shed some poundage, there is a passible substitute for a chicken parma out there.

Parma - 5.75

Chips - 1.30

Salad - 3.00

Value - 6.50

Total - 4.46

The search continues…

Attempt #138 - "The Union: Redux"

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When? - 18th of April, 2013

Where? - The Union Hotel. 252 Union Rd. Ascot Vale

Price? - $21.90 ($15 “Parmas of the World” night Thursday)

Website? -  http://unionhotel252.com.au/

Reviewers – Cale, Fridge, Lee, Matt, Nikki, Stefo [/info]

We gave the Union yet another go! Check out how the old girl has evolved in our 2015 review here.

This is a re-review of a previously reviewed pub, Click Here to check out what happened the first time, I will be referencing the previous attempt quite a bit this time around, so its worth having a gander.

A few weeks ago I received an email from a bartender at The Union, letting me know that, since our last visit in 2010, The parma has had a complete redo. New chef, new parma and (what piqued my interest the most) new salad, offering something more than just your standard garden salad fare. The vote was put to the Facebook page, and in a landslide victory The Union got up. So last night, for the first time since September 2010, we ascended the stairs into The Union.

The pub still looks great, cosy interior in front of a massive indoor/outdoor decked area, complete with TV’s and a pool table, with an open air area behind that. As I mentioned the previous time we were here, The Union was my Dad’s watering hole when I was growing up, so I’ve got a lot of memories in this place (although it’s virtually unrecognisable compared to what it was).

We took our seats and checked the menu…

Bingo. The ‘Trio of salads’ is what got me in the door, and the option of a plain schnitzel is appreciated - not that I’d ever take them up on it.

We placed our orders and took our seats, Only when we were seated did we realise a mate who had tagged along for the night had committed the most hellworthy of trespasses … He had ordered a steak.

After a tirade of verbal (and light physical) abuse, we accepted his choice and moved forward with our evening. After a decent wait (over 30 minutes) our parma’s arrived from the kitchen.

As we do with re-do’s, before you see the new parma, refresh your memory as to what we received the first time around …

September 2010

Drumroll…

April 2013

Visually, it looks a lot better on the plate. The “trio of salads” was a bit of a mish-mash, but we’ll get to that.

The parma looked extremely similar to the 2010 iteration, and the more I investigated the more it became apparent that they were pretty much identical. Yes it had the same thick, unprocessed chicken breast, but also the same soggy, sponge like crumbs, the same packet-ham, the same out-of-a-can extremely overpowering napoli, even the same “funky” taste that we couldn’t determine the source of last time.

We had previously said that this parma had its faults, but overall wasn’t bad - however as this was a callback review, The little things that we were willing to forgive the first time around bugged us that little bit more.

However the most disappointing thing about the dish has yet to me mentioned. It was cold. Well, not cold cold, but I wouldn’t say it was any higher luke-warm. I’ll put it this way, I wouldn’t be surprised if the chef was Sub-Zero from Mortal Kombat.

It was the final blow,

The parmas had obviously sat around in the kitchen for a while after being prepped, and it absolutely killed the dish for me.

The chips were the same. Pretty standard pub chips, well cooked and a decent serving. The slightly bigger plate meant less of the chips were crushed by the already soggy crumbs of the parma, but there were still quite a few casualties.

Now! The reason we walked back through the door - The trio of salads.

As I mentioned earlier, it was a bit of a mess on the plate, kind of hard to tell at times where one salad ended and the other began. Rather than lump them all in the same category, I’ll break them down by salad type

Potato Salad - Amazingly good. The star of the dish. Creamy, bursting with flavour (very garlic-y) and the potatoes just melted in your mouth. Definitely my favourite of the trio, I just wished I had more of it. Two and a half chunks of potato just wasn’t enough.

Coleslaw - Not as good as the potato salad, but still quality. Not as overpowering as some of the coleslaw’s we have had recently, Subtle flavours that complimented the dish well. Again - would have loved an extra tablespoon of this.

Greek - Very similar to the Garden Salad that accompanied the parma last time, but with the inclusion of olives, cucumber and feta cheese. My least favourite of the three, but still nothing to sneeze at. So much onion you’ll stink for a week, but I love onion in salads, so definitely a tick from me (other reviewers - not so much)

Overall the salads were a mixed bag. The potato salad was to die for - but there was so little of it I barely got to enjoy it. The coleslaw was solid and the greek salad was good if you liked onion, otherwise It could be a tad bland.

As far as value goes … Meh, price has risen $2.40 since 2010 but I suppose that’s to be expected. I wouldn’t be back anytime soon for $21.90. There is a $15 “Parma’s of the world” night on Tuesday nights that might be worth checking out, if only for the trio of salads - but I’m not marking it on my calendar anytime soon.

At the end of the day, Our mate had the right idea opting for the steak. Sure the salads were great and I applaud The Union for trying something different with their sides for a change. However no amount of salad can make up for a mediocre parma, and let this be a lesson to other pubs out there - If you call us back for a re-review, be prepared to be scrutinised, We expect a significant change to warrant a second go-round!

Parma - 2.83

Chips - 5.50

Salad - 6.17

Value - 3.58

Total - 4.18

The search continues…

Attempt #137 - 'The Oxford Scholar'

When? - 11th of April, 2013

Where? - The Oxford Scholar. 427 Swanston St. Melbourne

Price? - $16 ($12 Parma Mondays)

Website? - http://www.theoxfordscholar.com.au/

Reviewers – Adam, Janet, Lee, Matt, Nikki, Stefo, Tony

Update - We REVISITED THE NEW LOOK OXFORD SCHOLAR IN 2019 - CLICK HERE TO SEE THE LATEST REVIEW.

A few weeks ago we received an email from a reader suggesting we go to the Oxford Scholar, A pub that had been on the facebook vote a few times but never actually made it. I figured ‘what the hell’ put it up again and (low and behold) it got up! We loaded up the parma bus and took a trip to the Oxford Scholar.

I’m gonna sound old here, but the last time I had a sesh at the Scholar was nearly ten years ago, when a friend of mine was attending RMIT and invited me down for some beers with his uni mates. Back then the pub was much bigger and stood alone from the university, I was surprised to see that RMIT has now spilled across the road, and the Oxford Scholar now shares a wall with a university (which is a bit of a shame, as there used to be a massive beer hall out the back of the Scholar which now appears to be gone)

Still plenty spacious inside (with TAB and pool tables) we took a seat and checked the men

Sixteen bucks is definitely a student-friendly price these days, It didn’t inspire much hope that this would be a quality parma, but we placed our orders none the less.

The Oxford Scholar runs a bunch of $12 meal specials on different nights of the week (Monday being parma night). Last night (Thursday) was $12 steak night, we could see a lot of steaks coming out of the kitchen and I’ve gotta say they looked impressive. If I didn’t eat a parma every Thursday for the past few years (and for the foreseeable future) I’d definitely be back to give it a go.

Before too long (half a pint-ish) our parmas arrived…

Pretty much what I was expecting for a budget parma. Processed schnitzel, thick crumbs/thin chicken, rubbery cheese and canned napoli. The ham was good (as it usually is, its hard to stuff up ham) but overall it’s a budget parma for a budget price.

And yet… I kind’ve enjoyed it. Sure the ingredients were all canned and processed, but it was still piping hot and fresh. We have had a string of average parmas over the last few weeks, and maybe I am just adjusting to the mediocrity - but I didn’t mind it (although some of the other reviewers weren’t as kind as me).

The chips were quite good. Standard pub chips but a decent serving, well cooked and lightly seasoned with chicken salt. Who doesn’t love chicken salt? Definitely the highlight of the dish.

The salad was standard garden salad, nothing impressive but nothing bad. All the ingredients were fresh, and there was some variety on the plate (as opposed to the plate of lettuce we got last week).

The reviewers were rather quiet in quotes this week, I don’t know what got into them, next week I’ll poke them with a sharper stick

To be honest, for $16 its hard to ask for more, It’s a value parma at a pub connected to a University - If I were a starving student I’d be wrapped with what I received (especially on parma night, for $12 I’d be there every monday).

In saying that I can’t look past the low quality ingredients and processed shnitz… If you’re expecting cheap & nasty you’ll be pleasantly surprised.

Before I go, we choose which pub to visit each week by putting a poll on our facebook page - be sure to click over, cast your vote, and tell us where you want us to go!

Parma - 5.43

Chips - 5.65

Salad - 4.64

Value - 6.73

Total - 5.58

The search continues…

Attempt #136 - 'The Gertrude Hotel'

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When? - 4th of April, 2013

Where? - The Gertrude Hotel, 148 Gertrude St, Fitzroy

Price? - $20

Website? - http://thegertrudehotel.com.au/

Reviewers – Adam, Cale, Fridge, Grace, Lee, Matt, Stefo, Tony [/info]

Arriving at the Gertrude we were greeted with a fabulously inviting little bar. Dark stained wood, dim lighting, exposed bluestone walls - all the things I love in a pub (and the ever-rotating craft beer selection on tap was fantastic, worth the trip alone), I even heard murmurings of a quality little beer garden out the back that’s definitely worth checking out.

We took our seats and checked the bar menu.

Parma sighted

Parma ordered.

I had just finished the last mouthful of my first pint when they landed on the table (I’m a quick drinker and was damn thirsty after deciding that a walk from Elizabeth Street to Gertrude Street “wasn’t that far”).

Hmmm. First of all, the cheese on top was crazy overcooked, dark brown splotches were abound on all of the parmas (the one pictured above wasn’t the worst of the bunch) The schnitz, the cheeze, the napoli - everything was overcooked and dry (with the edges of the schnitzel actually burnt). However that can be forgivable if the ingredients are quality… lets take a look at the cross section -

Processed schnitzel, more crumb than chicken.

For a processed schnitzel the toppings saved it a little, but it was just so dry. The cheese was rubbery, the napoli had the consistency of tomato paste and the ham … actually the ham was probably the best part about the meal. It carried a great flavour that complimented the dish perfectly.

I’m normally not big on french fries, I prefer a chunky pub chip - but I’ve gotta say that for french fries these were actually okay - well seasoned and plenty of them, My one criticism being they were (like the parma) overcooked, the smaller ones tasting more like a bag of Smith’s chips than a fry.

Can you call it a salad when it only has one ingredient? For a pile of lettuce tossed in a little dressing it tasted alright - boring, but fresh, just a bit of cucumber, or tomato or anything other than lettuce would have been appreciated.

For $20 I was unimpressed. Normally I would say “If it wasn’t overcooked it had the elements of a great parma” but that is only partly true - sure it would have helped, but that faux-schnitzel is hard to overlook. Wouldn’t be back for the parma - Would be back for the pub, and the great drink selection.

Parma - 4.38

Chips - 4.63

Salad - 2.75

Value - 4.50

Total - 4.13

The search continues…

Attempt #135 -'The Spotted Mallard'

Apologies for the horrid pic, I realised at the last moment that I didn’t take one, that moment being sitting at the traffic lights out the front as we were leaving, snapped this photo as the lights turned green.

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When? - 28th of March, 2013

Where? - The Spotted Mallard, 314 Sydney Rd, Brunswick

Price? - $19

Website? - http://spottedmallard.com/

Reviewers – Janet, Lee, Matt, Pat, Shanan[/info]

This is gonna be a tough one. It’s not often that I disagree with the other reviewers at the table as much as I did this week, Part of the reason this review is a few days late is that I needed time to process what we ate and form my opinion… Oh well, lets dive in!

As a pub, The Spotted Mallard is a hidden gem. Walking past the lobby and seeing the unassuming wooden staircase one wouldn’t believe that it opens up to a massive ballroom-style space up above, with a great selection of craft beers and stellar balcony to watch the world of Sydney Road pass by below.

We arrived and took our seats, Famished and looking forward to my parma I had a leaf through the menu … and my heart sank.

Thigh.

The chicken parma at The Spotted Mallard does not use chicken breast, it uses chicken thigh. And this is where the major conflict of the night arose, as I cannot stand chicken thigh. (be prepared to read the word “thigh” a lot in the next few minutes… its gonna come up often)

I know people say that it carries a sweeter flavour than breast, and I have no problems eating thigh in a curry or something else heavily spiced, but a parma is supposed to be chicken breast. White, thick and juicy, how The Spotted Mallard were going to hammer a tiny chicken thigh into a workable parma was beyond me.

We placed our order and awaited the arrival of our meals. In preparation for typing up this review I visited the website for the Mallard and found this…

Last updated on the 14/10/12. Why would they change from breast to thigh?

A pint later, our parmas arrived at the table… I did my best to set aside my pre-conceived notions of thigh meat, and tucked in.

As suspected, there was no way they were serving up a full sized parma made from thigh meat, so instead we got two smaller parmas on the same plate. I tucked in, and did my best to enjoy it, but cutting through that grey thigh meat just turned me off.

The toppings, on the other hand, were great. The cheese was tasty, the napoli was home made, fresh and delicious and the prosciutto added its trademark saltiness to the dish that I can’t get enough of.

I just wish they had’ve used breast. It would have been amazing with breast.

The hand cut chips were great - crunchy on the outside and soft on the inside, they were in desperate need of some salt and maybe a dipping sauce, but gotta love a quality hand cut chip.

I have a problem with coleslaw for salad that I’ve mentioned in the past. I love that they are doing something different to a garden salad, and (for a pile of coleslaw) it was delicious. But coleslaw, especially home made coleslaw is a very rich dish, and a small garden salad to the side to break it up a little would have been greatly appreciated.

As you can see the other reviewers were a bit more open minded than me, but I just couldn’t get past the fact that it was thigh. I just can’t think of the reason as to why they switched to thigh meat for a chicken parma. Is it a cost issue? Because I’d be happy to chip in a couple of extra bucks for breast. It would have been great with breast.

Or is it just to be different? To stand out from the crowd? Look, I’m all for a unique parma (Palookaville’s parma-ish still stands as one my favourites), but there’s being unique, and being unique at a detriment to the dish - and in my (surely unpopular) opinion, The Spotted Mallard have crossed that line.

If you don’t mind thigh, check it out.

If you feel the same way that I do, still check it out for the pub alone (its a must-see location) - but you might want to avoid the parma.

What can I say? I’m a boob man, not a leg man.

Parma - 6.5

Chips - 6.9

Salad - 4.19

Value - 5.8

Total - 5.98

The search continues…

#134 - 'The Flying Duck'

When? - 21st of March, 2013

Where? - The Flying Duck, 67 Bendigo St. Prahran

Price? - $21

Website? - http://www.flyingduckhotel.com.au/

Reviewers - Adam, Cale, Kylie L, Lee, Matt, Nikki, Pat

Once again, I’m really not sure how The Flying Duck fell onto our radar (I should really start writing that stuff down), but last week in our facebook poll for which Prahran pub deserves our attention, The Flying duck demolished the competition, with more than double the votes of the pub that came in second (The College Lawn).

I love a backstreets pub, a hidden gem known only to the locals - and The Flying Duck is this in spades. The place was practically empty when we arrived on Thursday afternoon but it is very easy to envision the place bustling on a Friday evening or Sunday afternoon.

Pretty standard on the inside, the dining room of The Duck opens out to a massive glass greenhouse, in the middle of an even bigger and more spacious beer garden out the back. Very impressive and (as I said in the previous paragraph) perfect for a few pints on a warm Sunday arvo.

View of the greenhouse, taken from the beer garden.

We arrived at the duck and took a seat under the glass. Everyone was starving so we decided a pregame was necessary - An order for a couple of bowls of wedges and turkish bread was placed as we ordered our parmas

The wedges that arrived were quality - Standard wedges with standard bowls of sour cream and sweet chili sauce. Massive serves that went down a treat. The turkish bread with olive oil and balsamic vinegar was a little less inspired, but did the job adequately.

Very shortly after our pregame arrived, the parmas landed on the table…

I assure you, there is some chicken under that slice of ham. Unfortunately, not much. As you’ll see from the cross section below, the schnitzel was the most processed piece of bird we have seen in some time. Every element of the parma carried more thickness than the chicken itself. The crumbs were thicker, the cheese/napoli was thicker, hell even the slice of ham was bordering on being thicker than the actual chicken in this chicken parma.

The toppings were ordered in an odd way, the massive slice of ham on the bottom it formed a barrier between the schnitzel and everything else - leaving it possible to lift everything off if one wanted (as pictured below)

There was barely any cheese on the decent serving of napoli, unfortunately the nap just tasted of canned tomato paste.

To my distain I got through my parma, it was edible, but not an enjoyable experience.

The chips were fine, not as good as the wedges we had previously, but fine. Standard pub chips with zero seasoning and a little undercooked. The seasoning wasn’t an issue a there were salt pots along the table that brought the chips to life slightly. Sadly, the chips were probably the tastiest thing on the plate - and thats not saying much.

From the moment the plates hit the table the salad looked sad. You can see from the above photo that it was a wilted mess, to be completely honest it looked like it was made for the lunch shift and had been sitting around in a bowl in the kitchen all afternoon.

If this was a parma that I got for free at Crown after putting $50 in the pokies, I would still be disappointed. Paying $21 for this hot mess was just insulting. Wouldn’t cross the street to get it again, and driving from Essendon to Prahran for the experience was just a slap in the face (Citylink ain’t free!)

Trying to draw some positives from the experience - The pub itself was gorgeous, I love a good beer garden and The Flying Duck definitely had a tick in that box - According to the internets they pride themselves on being “dog friendly” even going as far as having special “Mad Dog Monday’s” where you are encouraged to bring your dog - This kinda thing is pretty cool, and I give them kudos for it.

And with a dog at your feet there’ll be an incognito place to slip your parma after you realise it’s rubbish.

Parma - 3.36

Chips - 3.64

Salad - 2.71

Value - 2.86

Total - 3.19

The search continues…

#133 - 'Captain Melville'

When? - 14th of March, 2013

Where? - Captain Melville, 34 Franklin St, Melbourne

Price? - $25

Website? - http://www.captainmelville.com.au/

Reviewers - Adam, Fridge, Lee, Nikki, Matt, Stefo

If the above photo looks familiar it is because we have been to this establishment before. Back in 2011 we visited this pub, however at the time it was known as “Miss Libertine” (Full review here). However times they are a-changing, out with the old/in with the new and all that.

So now Miss Libertine is Captain Melville, and I’ve gotta say, I’m impressed.

They haven’t just changed the sign, the pub has had a complete remodel since last time we were there, with both the decor and menu showing they are aiming for a more upmarket crowd that Libertine was, with less focus on live bands and music and more focus on quality food and drinks.

The place looks amazing, both in the front bar and out in the courtyard out the back, which feels like a beer garden until you look carefully and realise the whole thing is completely enclosed, no getting wet on winter nights here!

We arrived, took our seats, checked the menu and found the parma -

But quickly realised that there was so much more to try, so opted for a bit of pre-gaming before the main event (everything on the menu looked delicious, it was just too hard to decide)

So other than parmas, we got ourselves the following to share around the table -

• Salt & pepper squid with black garlic aioli
• Mt. Zero olives
• Charcuterie - A selection of cured meats with condiments
• Chicken Kiev balls (2 serves)

I won’t go into too much detail on the pregame, as this is Parma Daze not Pregame Daze, suffice to say it was all amazing (particularly the charcuterie), and hopefully a great sign of things to come.

Before we knew it we were polishing off the entree and the mains were arriving from the kitchen…

The parma itself was just outstanding. The chicken breast was of the highest quality, the herbed crumbs were amazing, the cheese was creamy and delicious and the ham complimented it all perfectly.

The napoli was delicious but in slightly short supply, could definitely have used a bit more. There were leaves throughout the parma (looked a lot like bay leaves) that added a very strong citrus taste to the dish. Now that sounds unappetising for a parma, but it worked surprisingly to its advantage, giving the meal a unique tang that we’ve yet to come across in the past.

The was much debate as to weather the chips were chips or wedges. They’re massive, cut in the same shape as a wedge, but without the trademark coating that makes a wedge a wedge - SoI’m gonna stick with the menu and call them hand cut chips.

Whatever they were I enjoyed them - At first they were quite bland, but a quick visit from Mr. salt shaker made short work of that. Once seasoned they were a very tasty chip, with the perfect combination of external crunch and internal softness.

In place of a garden salad was a serving of home made coleslaw, which was delicious and rich … a little too rich. It was quite a big lump of coleslaw, and although it complimented the schnitz perfectly there was just too much of it. Keep the coleslaw, but maybe half the size of the serving and throw a garden salad on the plate as well to keep things interesting.

The commenters were a talkative bunch this week -

The parma wasn’t cheap, clocking in at $25 it was up there on the price scale, but to be honest I’d happily pay that again. The flavours through that bird were outstanding and one I would have no qualms with revisiting. The ambience of the pub is fantastic and all of the food that came out of the kitchen was impressive.

Some of the attendees thought the schnitzel to be a bit on the small side for the price, but (not unlike goldilocks) I think it was just right. Due to the pregaming we were absolutely stuffed when the cheque came, but I think if we hadn’tve had the entrees I still would have left satisfied. Not as stuffed as I was mind you, but quite satisfied.

Definitely one to try.

Parma - 8.67

Chips - 7.00

Salad - 5.25

Value - 6.83

Total - 7.28

The search continues…

Attempt #132 - 'The Nixon'

[info]

When? - 7th of March, 2013

Where? - The Nixon, 757 Bourke st. Docklands

Price? - $22.90

Website? - http://www.nixonhotel.com.au/

Reviewers - Adam, Cale, Fridge, Janet, Lee, Matt, Nikki[/info]

Despite hearing good things about The Nixon, it wasn’t our first choice for this week. The weekly vote on our facebook page had us going to Outback Jack’s instead, however when I called to book OBJ’s on Thursday afternoon I discovered that the Docklands Outback Jack’s had gone out of business … something that their website fails to mention.

I was a relieved to be honest, I had little faith that Outback Jack’s would serve up a good parma. For one thing, they call it a parmy on their menu. Never a good sign!

So the location fell to whoever came in second in the vote, and that was … unnecessary drumroll… The Nixon! I made the booking and later that night we were walking in the door, under the shadow of Etihad stadium

Arooo!

When we arrived the pub trivia night was already underway, just waiting at the bar for a drink I knew the answers to all of the questions I heard, So I definitely want to head back and give it a go - Although a 6:30 start time struck me as odd, so early!

We grabbed some pints and made our way into the dining room, checked the menu and eyed our prize -

Sounds good to me! We placed the order for seven parmas and awaited their arrival while trying to work out why the pub has such a reverence for Richard “Tricky Dick” Nixon, The chicken wire bust is pretty cool, but… Just… Why Nixon?

Before too long (about half a pint) our parmas arrived from the kitchen -

I had to rotate the plate so the chips and salad were visible, so you can’t quite tell from this pic, but this parma was an absolute monster, here is another pic so you can get a better impression of the size of this beast.

She was a monster.

Now, in the past, parmas like this have fallen prey to what we have dubbed ‘big parma syndrome’ which is basically when you get these big’uns, they get boring far too quickly, and just end up being bland and monotonous.

The Nixon, however, did not suffer from big parma syndrome - the “three cheese mix”of cheeses gave the whole meal a fantastic flavour, with that tasty cheese tang penetrating through the whole meal and actually reminded me a little of the Prince of Wales parma from all those years ago.

The chicken was not processed and thick enough, the smoked ham added a great flavour to the dish and the crumbs were just right - not too thick, and maintained a solid crunch.

My only criticism would be the napoli - It tasted canned, processed and boring, more tomato soup than tomato napoli

The ‘steak chips’ were great. well cooked, crunchy on the outside, soft on the inside and well seasoned with chicken salt, which is always a winner. Could’ve been a few more on the plate, although with the size of the bird above the chips nobody left hungry.

The salad was surprisingly good, initially looking like a plain old garden salad, we quickly discovered a few olives and even a chunk of feta cheese that complimented the side perfectly. Pleasantly surprised

The Nixon parma is massive, there is no way you are walking away from that plate wanting more. I would be more than happy to pay $22.90 again for that dish any day of the week. They run a $15 Parma n’ Pot Night on Tuesday nights which, if the parma maintains the same quality as the one we had last night, is an outstanding deal and I would claim one of the best value parma nights going around.

I’m regarding Outback Jack’s being closed as a happy accident, as the parma we had instead was damn impressive. The perfect spot for a pre-footy parma. Trivia looked like a lot of fun as well, so if you’re in the area  at 6:30 be sure to give it a try.

And in Victoria it’s Parma, not Parmy. (I try to stay impartial on that debate, but I’m putting my foot down. It’s a Parma) That’s why you went out of business Outback Jack’s!

Parma - 7.07

Chips - 7.29

Salad - 6.93

Value - 6.79

Total - 7.03

The search continues…